is journey getting back together

Journey's Neal Schon Is Reconnecting With Steve Perry: 'We're Talking'

By Andrew Magnotta @AndrewMagnotta

July 7, 2022

After years of keeping their distance, Journey founder and guitarist Neal Schon and former singer Steve Perry have been steadily reconnecting.

But don't expect a reunion to come from it.

Asked by Vulture to recount one of his favorite memories with Perry, Schon revealed that the former songwriting partners are still making them.

"We were very, very tight," Schon said. "We're talking and getting to know each other again — though not trying to get together musically again, but he's learning who I am now, through a portion of our business that I'm kind of controlling now."

Schon could be referring to the saga that resulted in the 2020 departures of longtime Journey bassist Ross Valory and drummer Steve Smith , but he didn't go into detail.

He continued that he has "great memories of when Steve and I first met," and that the two were like brothers in the early years of their partnership in Journey. While the two have only just begun confabulating again, Schon confirms that the band's 2017 Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction was essentially the beginning of this new stage in their relationship; it got them in the same room again.

"During that induction, when certain individuals went up and took a really long time with their speeches, there are a few pictures that you can find where I'm talking into Steve's ears and he's laughing like hell," Schon noted. "Some people like to feel like they're more important because they have to talk longer. Or they feel like they don't get the attention they need so they want to talk longer. So, that's my long way of saying that I hope that [Steve and I] can become even better friends in the future."

Perry, who began writing and recording music again in 2018 after 25 years in hiatus, has been guarded publicly about his relationship with his former Journey bandmates. He explained in one 2018 interview that he didn't believe having a relationship with Schon could happen without stirring up rumors of a reunion with Journey .

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Neal Schon Says Journey Will Play Stadiums for 50th Anniversary, Doesn’t Rule Out Steve Perry Return

The year 2023 will be a big one for Journey , who will celebrate their 50th anniversary as a band and in a rather significant way — guitarist Neal Schon has suggested the group will play stadiums next year in what is still quite a secretive operation. And he didn't rule out the return of two classic members either.

His comments came in an interview with  Entertainment Tonight , which also touched on Journey's new album Freedom and their Las Vegas residency shows which feature a symphony orchestra. Schon even laughed a bit when he was asked how many times Journey rehearsed with the orchestra before opening night and replied, "One day."

The interview then put the focus on the future and what lies ahead beyond the Vegas gigs as Journey prepare to celebrate 50 years as a band. "We're going back into stadiums with someone I can't really talk about right now," commented Schon, playing things close to the vest while managing to tease what appears to be quite a massive forthcoming announcement.

The guitarist was also asked about the likelihood of singer Steve Perry and keyboardist Gregg Rolie, who split with the group in 1998 and 1980, respectively. "You know, I think that those two guys were a big part of the band and I think if [it] permits - the city permits - the fans would overall love it," says Schon, though it's uncertain exactly what he meant in regards to the city permits — perhaps securing stadium locations and complying with local noise ordinances, but that remains unconfirmed.

Schon didn't rule out the return of either member and those comments follow recent remarks where the guitarist claimed he and Perry are "talking and getting to know each other again" but cautioned that they "are not trying to get together musically again."

Earlier this year, in May, the lone remaining Journey founder told UCR , "We’re going to celebrate the 50th anniversary and then celebrate it again in ‘24,” Schon tells UCR. “It’s my 50th year with Journey and I’m the only original member left there. You know, Jon [Jonathan Cain] is 40 years with us. Deen [Castronovo] has a good two decades and Arnel [Pineda] is now 15 years, the longest run of any singer [with Journey]."

He even has his eyes on sharing the bill with Carlos Santana and revealed in that same conversation, "I talked to Carlos and I talked to his manager about it the other day. He says Carlos definitely wants to do some stuff. I said, what about the latter part of ‘23? We could possibly go from big arenas in Europe to stadiums and finish out ‘23 in the stadiums, in South America and all of that."

Journey Interview With  Entertainment Tonight

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Steve Perry Still Believes

By Andy Greene

Andy Greene

It’s a Monday afternoon in August, and Steve Perry is cheerfully belting out the Backstreet Boys’ “As Long As You Love Me.” Perry is visiting a buddy at his house in San Francisco, and the singer — who grew up on Sam Cooke, Otis Redding and the Kingston Trio, and doesn’t listen to much current pop — is giving an example of a relatively modern song that caught his ear. “I love songs like this,” he says of the tune, a Max Martin–penned ballad from 1997. “I’m a sappy guy.”

It’s somewhat surprising to hear Perry, 69, sing a hit by a boy band a generation behind him. What’s really surprising, though, is that Perry is singing at all. Virtually nobody has seen him do this since he parted ways with his band, Journey , 20 years ago. Perry and Journey became famous in the Seventies and Eighties for big, soaring arena-rock hits about devotion, passion and seizing the moment, some of them a little sappy indeed, all of them driven by Perry’s skyscraping vocals, which exerted a massive influence on generations of wasted karaoke warriors. In the process, Journey basically invented the power ballad. Critics often dismissed the band as cheeseballs, but that wasn’t fair; songs like “Faithfully” and “Lights” stand up as beautiful and plainspoken showcases for Perry’s remarkable voice. “We certainly were part of pioneering [the power ballad],” Perry says. “I didn’t care what the critics thought about the band. I really didn’t. All I knew is every night we would get at least one to two encores. That was my critical review for me every night.”

Perry left Journey in 1987, but he never had sustained success as a solo artist. After the commercial failure of his second solo album, he got back together with his former bandmates in the mid-Nineties. They made a comeback album, scored a radio hit with the romantic ballad “When You Love a Woman” and earned a Grammy nomination. Irving Azoff, who had just made the Eagles a fortune for their reunion album, was brought in to manage the band. The future looked bright.

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Everything changed when Perry took a long hike in Hawaii and felt a horrible pain in his hip as he reached the top of a mountain. He was just in his mid-forties but discovered he had a degenerative bone condition that would require hip-replacement surgery. Terrified at that prospect, Perry experimented with alternative treatments that did little to address the problem.

Eventually, Perry’s bandmates started getting restless. “They wanted me to make a decision on the surgery,” Perry says. “But I didn’t feel it was a group decision. Then I was told on the phone that they needed to know when I was gonna do it ’cause they had checked out some new singers.” Perry begged them to reconsider, but then postponed the date of his big surgery. “I said to them, ‘Do what you need to do, but don’t call it Journey,’” he says. “If you fracture the stone, I don’t know how I could come back to it.”

They didn’t listen. Journey found a Perry soundalike named Steve Augeri and launched a tour that continues to this day. In 2008, Arnel Pineda — a Filipino singer they found on YouTube — took over on vocals, and the group began selling as many tickets as it did in its Eighties heyday, quite possibly thanks to Pineda’s uncanny ability to sound more or less exactly like Perry, whom he grew up worshipping. Understandably, Perry is a little uneasy talking about all of this, but he’s never made any attempt to reunite with his former mates. He showed up for Journey’s induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 2017 and made an acceptance speech, though he didn’t perform with the band. “What they do is none of my business,” he says. “When I walked away from it, I did not go to any of the shows, nor did I listen to any of it.”

While his former bandmates were making millions on the road, Perry was doing, well, not all that much. He rode around aimlessly on his motorcycle and moved from the Bay Area to San Diego, though he routinely flew back for San Francisco Giants games. Perry lived off his royalties (he says he carefully tucked away money from his Journey days) and avoided the spotlight, rarely giving interviews and politely turning away fans who begged for a photo. Basically, he became the J.D. Salinger of arena rock. “I didn’t sing in those years,” he says. “I didn’t write music. I must have gained 50 or 60 pounds. I got a butch haircut. I just said, ‘I’m going to just become a plump kid in my hometown again.’ I’d already lived the dream of dreams and didn’t know how I could come close to being anything like what I was before.”

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Rumors about Perry began to pile up. “They say I’m a recluse with long nails saving my urine in jars and living on an island with a morphine drip,” he says. “They think I’m in a hospital somewhere with cancer. And they say I can’t sing anymore.”

That last one stings the most, and as he sings the Backstreet Boys song it’s clear it’s not true. Perry’s voice is certainly deeper than in his Journey days, when his upper register could rival any rock singer’s, but it’s still unmistakably Steve Perry: rich, raspy, expressive and overflowing with the sort of pulsating emotion that caused even Journey’s fiercest critics to compare him to his idol, Sam Cooke.

Perry hasn’t lost his voice, but he has lost a lot over the years: his grandparents, who had helped raise him in rural Northern California after his mom and dad split; both of his parents; and his stepfather, who gave Perry work in his construction business to help him make ends meet in the pre-Journey days. “You want to know what I did after I left the band?” he says. “I visited my mom’s grave a lot.”

Loneliness could creep in quickly. “One time I parked my car in front of the house I was raised in,” Perry says. “It was raining like crazy, the wipers were going and I was facing the house where I was raised, with my grandfather’s house to the right. I just started crying like a baby. I cried for the times we could have had together. I cried for the times that I took for granted. And they were all gone, and here I am, an only child, just missing them all. I used to think that if I became a performer and everybody loved me, that I wouldn’t have to go through these things. But guess what? There’s nowhere to run. If you’re alive, you have to walk through this eventually.”

All of the loss may explain why the frontman who radiated such passion in his Journey days no longer felt much like singing. There was another big loss to come, but this one would lead him back to music, and, eventually, to his new solo album, Traces. It’s a story about devotion, tragedy and a promise to a dying loved one. It’s so intense and heartfelt, it could be a Journey song.

Much of what happened to Perry in the past decade can be traced back to his most famous song. Perry wrote “Don’t Stop Believin’” with Journey keyboardist Jonathan Cain and guitarist Neal Schon in 1981. The title phrase came from Cain’s father, something he’d say to encourage his son to keep going when he was a young musician eking out an existence in L.A.

Cain said he drew inspiration from characters he knew in the Sunset Strip rock scene of the early 1970s: These were the “streetlight people living just to find emotion” of the song’s lyrics. Perry has a different memory. “Jonathan and I scrawled out the lyrics about things that I had seen in Detroit one night after a show, looking way down to the street and seeing the streetlights light the streets,” he says. “I couldn’t see the lights, but could just see the glow of the lights facing down from about the 10th floor. I see people walking around at two, three in the morning. I thought, ‘Wow, streetlight people. That’s so cool.’” (He and Cain do agree on one thing: There’s no such place as South Detroit. They just needed an extra syllable before “Detroit” and weren’t familiar with the city’s geography.)

“Don’t Stop Believin’” hit Number Nine in 1981, though by the turn of the millennium, it was just one of Journey’s many hits, not even important enough to be mentioned by name in the band’s Behind the Music episode. But the song had one very important fan. Today, Patty Jenkins is one of the hottest directors in Hollywood, thanks to the Wonder Woman  franchise. Back in 2003, though, she was just a fledgling filmmaker who needed the perfect song for a scene in her low-budget movie Monster , about the life of serial killer Aileen Wuornos. During a key scene early in the film, Wuornos (played by Charlize Theron) roller-skates with her girlfriend. Jenkins figured that “Don’t Stop Believin’” would be the ideal song to punctuate the moment with a sense of unbridled optimism (before things went very, very bad, that is).

Jenkins had one big hurdle to getting “Don’t Stop Believin’” in her movie: persuading Perry to let her use the song. “Everyone told us the worst things about Steve,” says Jenkins. “They said he had disappeared, said no to everything, would never say yes and was all about the money.” Still, she sent him a rough cut of the scene along with her phone number. Much to her shock, he called her the next day and raved about the clip. “He gave us the song for practically nothing,” she says. “He just laughed at the rumors [I had heard]. The truth was, he said no to everything because he didn’t want the money. People weren’t understanding the song, and he didn’t want it to be sold out in that way.”

Monster became a surprise hit and won Theron a Best Actress Oscar. It also helped kick off the amazing second life of “Don’t Stop Believin’.” All of a sudden, the song was everywhere: On TV ( Glee used it six different times), on Broadway (it was the closing number in the musical Rock of Ages ), and even in the clubhouse of the 2005 Chicago White Sox, who made “Don’t Stop Believin’” their unofficial anthem on the way to winning the World Series. The song’s renaissance went into overdrive when The Sopranos used it in the show’s last-ever scene, in 2007.

There was something weirdly profound in the song’s sudden universal popularity: This slightly goofy Eighties anthem seemed to hit all of America in an emotional sweet spot that went way beyond mere “ironic” nostalgia, wiping out cultural barriers in an avalanche of cheesy optimism. It’s no wonder people literally sang it in the streets the night of Barack Obama’s election. The tune Perry was happy to sell for next to nothing had become the new national anthem. “It’s amazing to me,” says Perry. “All of my songs are like children to me. Once you send them out to the world you hope they’re strong enough to survive out there. All of them got the same attention, but the world decides which ones become the ‘Don’t Stop Believin’s,’ not me.”

For Perry, the song’s rebirth was important in another way. He and Jenkins became friends while she was working on Monster, and with plenty of spare time on his hands in the following years, Perry liked to lounge around the director’s editing suite and watch her work. One day in 2011, she was editing a Lifetime movie about breast-cancer patients when Perry saw a face on the screen that caught his eye. It was Kellie Nash, a Los Angeles psychologist. She was two decades Perry’s junior, and she was battling breast cancer. “I went, ‘Whoa, whoa, whoa, can you spool back to … stop right there. … Who’s that?’” Perry remembers. “Her smile killed me. I felt like I knew her somehow, and I never met her before.”

Perry asked for her e-mail address, but Jenkins said he should understand her condition before reaching out. Nash’s cancer had spread to her lungs and her bones. There was no exact timetable for how long she had left, but the prognosis was grim. “At that moment I had the opportunity to send no e-mail, pull back, no harm, no foul,” he says. “It just would all die at that moment. I would just go back to my safe life. Instead, I said, ‘Send the e-mail.’”

It placed him in a vulnerable position. “I didn’t want to go through another loss,” he says. “I was trying to continue moving through life on my own. But there was a simple gorgeousness about her that was just stunning.”

They met up at a restaurant near Nash’s house and talked for six hours. Before long, they were living together. For a few months, it was bliss. “Then one horrible day she said she was having headaches,” Perry says. “We got an MRI, and then later the oncologist called the house and said she had brain metastases. She fell apart right there in front of me, screaming and crying. It was the most difficult day in my life because she just melted in my arms in fear.”

Perry and Nash moved to New York so she could have access to an experimental treatment in the Bronx. His favorite time of day came in the evening, when he held Nash as she tried to fall asleep. One evening, she turned toward him with something very serious on her mind. “She said, ‘If something ever happens to me, I want you to make one promise,’” he recalls. “ ‘Promise me you won’t go back into isolation. If you do, I fear this would all be for naught.’” She urged him to make music again.

Nash died on December 14th, 2012. “Ever since I was a kid, and especially since I became successful in the music industry, I just wanted people to love me,” Perry says. “I never knew when someone did for real. I always had a reluctance to believe it. I think it comes out of my youth when my parents split up, but something inside me always had doubts.

“But let me tell you how I know. When you’re in love with someone like Kellie Nash and she looks you right in the eyes and says, ‘I love you.’ That’s how you know. She made me the luckiest man in the world.”

What Perry really wants to talk about — the reason he’s willing to sit down and revisit these parts of his life — is  Traces. It’s the result of five years of work (though there was an extended break in the middle for another hip-replacement surgery). He cut it at his home studio without any record label paying the bills or making him sweat out a deadline. The songs, many of them ballads, reflect on love, loss and the difficult moments in between. Some are directly about Nash, like “October in New York,” where he looks back at their final weeks together, while others are character-driven. The sound is a little more subdued than classic Journey: elegant, tasteful, soulfully autumnal. (Backstreet Boys aside, he avoids modern pop and has a particular aversion to drum machines; when a Top 40 station comes on one day over lunch, he insists on bolting from the restaurant to talk outside.)

Perry’s collaborators were delighted to find out he still had his voice. “When I first heard his demos, I was like, ‘Wow, there’s the voice!’” says guitarist Thom Flowers, a co-producer on the album. “But then in the studio, I got to see it myself. He likes to record in the control room, so we’d both put headphones on and he’d be two feet away from me. Without any warm-up, it just came out of him. It reminded me of watching a thoroughbred horse work.”

Perry almost couldn’t believe it himself when work on the album wrapped. “I told some friends of mine that I actually did something I said I’d never do again,” he says. “I made that commitment to Kellie and then a commitment to myself to actually complete it.”

“I always hoped that he would do this one day,” says Jenkins. “All along he’d been playing me these stunning tracks. I was always like, ‘Steve! What the hell? That’s a masterpiece!’ Hearing him give this to the world again is so moving.”

Perry may be willing to sit down for a series of extensive interviews, but there’s still an aura of mystery surrounding him. For example, his buddy Steve, whose home Perry is visiting. Steve — tall, kind, bald — lives in Mill Valley, one of the wealthiest neighborhoods in the Bay Area. After answering the door, he offers us coffee. There are photos on the wall of this Steve fellow with the pope. “He’s just a friend of mine,” says Perry, refusing to say anything about him. “An old friend of mine. Keep him anonymous.”

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Perry says he’s had a number of serious relationships in his life, but besides Nash and his 1980s girlfriend Sherrie Swafford (immortalized in Perry’s 1984 solo hit “Oh Sherrie”), he won’t talk about any of them. Perry concedes that he has never been married and is-currently single, but goes quiet when the subject of children comes up. (Internet sleuths theorize that a woman he’s often photographed with named Shamila is his daughter. She bears a striking resemblance to him.) “I don’t want to talk about [kids],” he says. “There’s a private part of my life that I won’t have if I talk about it.”

I notice a gold pendant in the shape of a musical eighth-note around his neck. This gets him talking. “My mom gave it to me when I was 12,” he says. “She always believed in me. I wore it for years and years, but hung it up in May of 1998, just after the band and I legally split and I had a complete contractual release from all my obligations to the band and label. I put it back on about 10 years ago.”

As we spoke, Journey were hours away from taking the stage at the Smoothie King Center in New Orleans — on a double bill with Def Leppard — one of 60 shows they played this summer. As they do every night, they’ll dedicate “Lights” to Perry. It’s a gesture of gratitude, and for good reason. When Perry joined Journey in 1977, none of the group’s albums had sold well, and the band was pumping out anonymous jazz fusion. Perry changed everything. In him, Journey found a singer who not only wrote big, concise, catchy songs, but also belted them to the cheap seats. Without him, Journey might well have been a prog-rock footnote.

Perry claims to feel no bitterness toward anyone in the band, even though he’s seen the members only twice, and briefly at that, in the past 20 years, and has rebuffed attempts to reconnect on a social level. Guitarist Neal Schon seems desperate for some sort of reconciliation and often tells interviewers he wants to create new music with Perry — not even necessarily for Journey. Schon has heard that Perry frequents his favorite coffee shop, and the guitarist hopes to run into the singer there. Pressed on this, Perry says he can’t imagine working with Schon in any capacity or even re-establishing the friendship.

“I’m not sure that’s possible without stirring up hopes of a reunion,” he says. “Please listen to me. I left the band 31 fucking years ago, my friend. You can still love someone, but not want to work with them. And if they only love you because they want to work with you, that doesn’t feel good to me.”

When I bring up Cain’s new memoir, Don’t Stop Believin ’ — an innocuous, uncontroversial book where he looks back on his life and heaps endless praise onto his bandmates, past and present — a look of disgust comes across Perry’s face. “I don’t really care to read Jonathan’s book,” he says. “And I’d appreciate if you didn’t tell me about it. I don’t need to know. It’s none of my business.”

But his mind is also on the future. Plans are still unclear, but Perry wants to launch a tour of some sort to promote Traces. He says he’ll sing the Journey hits again, meaning that “Faithfully,” “Separate Ways (Worlds Apart)” and, yes, “Don’t Stop Believin’” will come out of his mouth for the first time in nearly a quarter century. He clutches the eighth-note his mother gave him, the one he put back on around the time Nash came into his life, and tries to make sense of it all. “I’m not the only one that goes through life,” he says with a deep sigh. “We’re all going through it, and I’m tolerating it the best I can.”

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Journey is back with a new lineup and new music

• Updated: Sep. 14, 2021, 3:11 p.m. |
• Published: Sep. 14, 2021, 5:49 a.m.

Arnel Pineda, left, and Neal Schon of the band Journey perform on day three of the Lollapalooza music festival on Saturday, July 31, 2021, at Grant Park in Chicago. (Photo by Rob Grabowski/Invision/AP) Rob Grabowski/Invision/AP

• Gary Graff, special to cleveland.com

CLEVELAND, Ohio -- Journey’s members have a simple message for those who figured it was a band least likely to headline at Lollapalooza, a festival that’s long celebrated the current and cutting edge.

Don’t stop believin’.

The group, a Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductee in 2017, indeed won raves and a big Hulu TV audience for its July 31 performance in Chicago’s Grant Park, which had tens of thousands singing along to “Don’t Stop Believin’” and the group’s parade of other hits. It’s part of a series of post-pandemic shows Journey, debuting a new lineup, has been playing this summer, with a Las Vegas residency slated for December.

And all that has been accompanied by new music. A single and animated video, “The Way We Used to Be,” came out in June, and Journey has recorded a new album -- its first since “Eclipse” in 2011 -- though it hasn’t yet announced a release date.

It’s safe to say that despite some harsh critics still out there, the journey goes on and on and on and on...

“Journey has become a crossover with kids, more than people realize,” says Jonathan Cain, keyboardist and guitarist since 1980 and a chief architect behind Journey’s nine-times platinum “Escape” album, celebrating its 40th anniversary this year. “There’s a lot of factors there. ‘Don’t Stop Believin’’ was in ‘The Sopranos’ (finale), and on ‘Glee.’ It’s the most-performed karaoke song, one of the top five wedding songs, and then you have ‘Open Arms’ and ‘Faithfully’...

“We have permeated the young culture, and we still have the fans who were with us back when everything happened. We’re very blessed in that way.”

This Journey resurgence, in fact, comes after one of the darker chapters in the band’s 48-year history.

It was only a few years ago, back in 2017 that guitarist and co-founder Neal Schon was sniping at his bandmates, primarily Cain, via social media, even as the group was touring together. The issues, other than a band visit to the White House (Cain’s wife, televangelist Paula White, was one of Donald Trump’s advisers) were unclear and seemed to have little effect on the band’s performances.

Now Schon -- who formed the band in 1973 after a tenure with Santana -- acknowledges that “there was a period there where some things weren’t really right, and it took time to figure out what was going on and what to do about it.” And those things became clear on March 3, 2020, when Schon and Cain announced they’d fired co-founder and bassist Ross Valory and longtime drummer Steve Smith for an alleged “attempted corporate coup d’état” to take over the Journey and all of its trademarks.

Valory and Smith were supported in a countersuit by former frontman Steve Perry and former manager Herbie Herbert, but Schon and Cain moved forward while the matter was being litigated.

“Everybody wanted to own the brand, and I felt there was a takeover going on,” says Schon, who had started another band, Journey Through Time, that included Santana bandmate Greg Rolie, another Journey co-founder. One of the group’s old managers, in fact, even suggested Schon should quit the band he started, which only strengthened his resolve to establish new order to the group, which has sold more than 80 million albums worldwide.

“The ship is not going down. No one’s stealing the brand,” declares Schon, 67, who’s limited by the legalities from talking about too many specifics. “Things took a turn, businesswise, that I didn’t like, and that Jonathan didn’t like and we decided not to go along with it. There were a lot of unrealistic statements that were being made by different people and us not really talking and just believing what others were saying.

“Once I actually sat and talked to Jonathan, we cleared everything up and got rid of the divide-and-conquer scenario and realized we had a lot more to say musically together, as brothers.”

Journey also changed management and did some other housecleaning and legal reshuffling, as well as working on settling trademark issues that hadn’t been firmly established in the past.

“It was sort of a shocking thing, that brothers had come to that,” Cain says. “We had to sort it out. You get lemons, you make lemonade -- what else are you gonna do? It’s probably not that out of the ordinary for bands to do this kind of stuff, and it’s usually based on greed or whatever. I really am glad it’s behind us, that’s all -- and I wish everybody well, really. I have no ill will towards anyone.”

Journey now comprises Schon and Cain, as well as Arnel Pineda, the Filipino singer who joined in 2007 after Schon saw his performances of Journey songs on YouTube. Randy Jackson of “American Idol” fame returns in the bass slot, which he filled from 1985-87 -- though Marco Mendoza is filling in while Jackson recovers from back surgery. New to the lineup is Narada Michael Walden on drums, while Jason Derlatka, who’s been a hidden adjunct member for live performances, is now a full-time member on keyboard.

And, in a surprise move last month, Deen Castronovo, drummer from 1998-2015, is also back in the fold.

“We’re moving forward -- that’s all I can tell you, man,” says Schon, who put out an instrumental solo album, “Universe,” last fall and last month auctioned 112 of his guitars for more than $4.2 million. “It still sounds like Journey, but there is definitely a different strut in the rhythm section with Randy and Narada. It’s bombastic. It’s rocking. It’s majestic, and it’s soulful.

“I believe we got in a bit of a rut, for me, in the latter years of just playing exactly the same thing every night. It doesn’t have to be like that. We have so much material, and I think it’s great music and can all be brought to life in a new way and an updated way. That’s what we’re pursuing now.”

Journey has more than 20 songs it’s been working on for the new album, much of it being worked on remotely between Schon and Walden on the West Coast and Cain in Nashville and Florida. “The Way We Used to Be” is a case in point, growing from a piece of music Schon and Walden constructed and then sent to Cain for lyrics and additional melody.

Jonathan Cain of the band Journey performs on day three of the Lollapalooza music festival on Saturday, July 31, 2021, at Grant Park in Chicago. (Photo by Rob Grabowski/Invision/AP) Rob Grabowski/Invision/AP

“The lyric has a sort of angst to it, and the question was ‘can we ever get back?’” explains Cain, 71, who also released a new Christian rock single, “Oh Lord Lead Us,” last month. “There’s that frustration of being separated, by the pandemic, and a little fear in it. It just had enough for me to go, ‘OK, then we’ll just put a little R&B thing on it and story tell it and get to that chorus, which fit right into what (Schon) had.”

Both Schon and Cain say the new album is in its finishing stages. It has a tentative title that they’re not revealing yet, but the package is being designed by Jim Welch, who worked with the band on several albums, including “Infinity,” “Departure” and “Escape.” “It’s typical Journey, I think,” Cain says. “We’re back to our old sound, but it’s got a little bit more on the bottom end. It’s got fire. It’s just a little bit more edge to it. Neal’s playing his butt off, and it’s very driven, very cool. The songs came very interestingly. I like it a lot.”

For Schon, meanwhile, “I’m just all about moving forward right now. I’m making so much music and there are so many positive things happening. I’ve bought a lot of new guitars and I’m having a blast playing. We’ll get all this other (stuff) taken care of and behind us, and then it’s just full speed ahead. I can’t wait.”

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Journey Reflects on New Album, Whether Steve Perry Could Return for 50th Anniversary Shows (Exclusive)

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The rock legends of Journey are approaching nearly half a century of hitmaking with a new No. 1 album and a Las Vegas residency, to boot! ET was with the icons in Sin City for an exclusive look at their orchestral show and to get the inside story on their first new music in more than a decade. 

"Hearing it when it was finished it was definitely emotional," lead guitarist Neal Schon tells ET's Denny Directo of their new album, Freedom , which marks their first full-length release in 11 years. "We had recorded this album in a way different way because of COVID." 

The band recorded Freedom entirely separate from one another, laying down their respective parts individually in different parts of the world. 

"You get lemons, you make lemonade," says keyboardist Jonathan Cain, revealing the surprising silver lining they discovered through the process. "We were stuck at home. We were supposed to be on tour with The Pretenders and everything got shut down. So we just thought, 'Why not?' And we also made the record for half the price. ... We spent half the money, so we got a blessing from it." 

"It will never be the same," vocalist Arnel Pineda chimes in with a laugh. "So we'll do the same thing again to save money, right?" 

Creatively, the band drew on both past and present experiences while striving to stay true to the heart of what fans have come to know and love about them. 

"I feel that we encompassed like a lot from Infinity to where we are now in this album," says Schon, referencing Journey's 1978 full-length featuring their first Billboard Hot 100 hit, "Wheel in the Sky." 

"It's very diverse, it's very musical," he continues. "I’m happy with that. I think it really represents that band well."

In 2023, Journey will celebrate 50 years in the biz. To commemorate their golden anniversary, the group has planned a slew of upcoming performances into the years ahead, including stadium shows and -- in their words: "More pyro!" and "Firing bombs onstage right, bro!" 

With more than 100-million records sold, 19 Top 40 singles and 25 Gold and Platinum albums under their belts, Journey remains one of the best-selling bands of all-time.

Pineda has been a part of that success for 15 years after replacing lead singer Steve Perry in 2007. The 54-year-old says his life went "from black to white" when joining the group. "These guys, I owe so much to them," he says. 

As for whether they would bring back former band members Perry and Gregg Rolie for the anniversary shows, Schon is open to the possibility. 

"I think that those two guys were a big part of the band," he says, "and I think that, you know, if the city permits, I think the fans would overall love it."

Just last week, Journey rocked two of four planned performances from July 15-23 at Resorts World Theater in Las Vegas alongside Violution Orchestra. Only ET was with them for the soundcheck. 

"So much came to life with that orchestra," gushes drummer Deen Castronovo. "I mean, they were already beautiful songs and they have such a life of their own. But when you get that orchestra, it's so lush, man. I mean, it's amazing sounding. It really is." 

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Journey Return with New Single “The Way We Used To Be”: Stream

Marking the band's first new music in 10 years

Journey have returned with “The Way We Used To Be”, their first new music since 2011. The song marks the band’s first release with its revamped lineup, including returning bassist Randy Jackson of American Idol fame.

The track is classic Journey, featuring soaring arena rock guitar riffs and bombastic synths. It imagines a world in which the COVID-19 pandemic is entirely over. “We’re in this together/ It’s about what we choose,” sings Arnel Pineda. “Our fears we have got to let go/ As long as there’s me and you.”

In a statement, founding member and lead guitarist Neal Schon broke down how “The Way We Used To Be” was made:

“I laid down the keyboard loop with over-dubbed rhythm and a little blues lead guitar and sent to Jonathan. He sent it back very shortly after with demo vocals and lyrics and I said to myself with a smile — we’ve still got it! I felt Jonathan nailed the lyrics and melody with haunting chorus ‘got to get back’ — ‘to the way we used to be.'”

Schon further explained the song is a “complete new beginning chapter” for Journey, with the band collectively writing and working together. They have over 26 songs written for their upcoming album and are whittling it down to 10 or 12.

“The Way We Used To Be” is the first studio recording with the band for recently added members Narada Michael Walden (drums) and Jason Derlatka (keyboards, backing vocals). Jackson last contributed to new Journey material on 1986’s  Raised On Radio .

Walden and Derlatka joined Journey after founding bassist Ross Valory and drummer Steve Smith were fired from the band in March 2020. Schon and longtime keyboardist/pianist Jonathan Cain, who hold the rights to the Journey name, accused Valory and Smith of attempting a “corporate coup d’état” to take the brand for themselves.

With the new lineup firmly set in place, the septet will play Chicago’s Lollapalooza on July 31st and iHeartRadio Music Festival in Las Vegas in September.

Watch Journey’s animated “The Way We Used To Be” video below.

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Arnel Pineda Teases Journey About Steve Perry Return

Journey singer Arnel Pineda revealed that he liked to tease bandmates Neal Schon and Jonathan Cain about inviting former frontman Steve Perry to return.

They’re currently working on a new album , expected this year, while Perry broke his quarter-century silence with the release of Traces in 2018. At the time, he strongly ruled out any chance of rejoining his old band.

Despite the fact that it would cause problems for his own career, Pineda told Rolling Stone that it would be a “dream” to see Perry back onstage with Journey. “I’m delivering on the legacy that 'the voice' has left behind,” he said. “Especially now that he formally passed the torch to me in 2017 … he made that known and he was very gracious. It was very kind of him. It was so generous of him to say that in public. It was really an honor.”

He called  Traces “amazing” and said that, as a result of Perry’s comeback, he’s been “teasing Jonathan and Neal: ‘Why don’t you invite Steve Perry over for a tour?’” He described what it would mean to him: “I never saw them back in the ‘80s. I was just a young kid in Manila, just playing around, with no chance of going to the States and seeing their show, but they were one of my favorite bands.”

When told that Perry had spoken highly of him in recent interviews, Pineda said, “That’s even more pressure I’m getting, hearing this from you. At the same time, I’m truly honored. But I’m not losing [the hope] that one day he’ll join the band for two or three songs. It would be one of the highlights of my life if that happens.”

He insisted it would be “okay to me” if Perry did choose to return and left him without a job. “That’s how much I adore him and I adore Journey and how much I adore Steve Perry,” he said. “I just wish that one show with him … it would change my life forever.”

Journey Lineup Changes: A Complete Guide

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Neal Schon Addresses Possibility Of Steve Perry’s Return To JOURNEY For Upcoming 50th Anniversary Tour

• July 21, 2022
• 1 minute read

In a recent conversation with Entertainment Tonight, guitarist  Neal Schon  mentioned that singer  Steve Perry  might return to  Journey  for the upcoming 50th-anniversary tour.

“We’re going back into stadiums with someone I can’t really talk about right now.

“You know, I think that those two guys were a big part of the band and I think [that] if the city permits, the fans would overall love it.”

Earlier, Neal Schon has recently been talking about how the acquisition of Journey’s trademark led him to rekindle his relationship with the singer Steve Perry, as he told Eddie Trunk in a recent interview .

Here’s what he said:

“It definitely was nothing about music at all; it was just basically catching up — some things about business, some things about ‘how’re you doing in your life,’ just general friendship stuff. And [I’m] looking forward to moving forward with him like that, just as a friend.”

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19 comments.

I didn’t get to see him with Journey and it would sure make my life good

Hell yeah!!!!

If it Happens I will Definitely be in attendance

Come to Columbia SC Journey isn’t the same without Steve Perry

Never got to see him with Journey so Please Please let this happen I’m so in!!! We love you the voice.

steve perry is journey

Don’t stop believin’ that they’ll get back together!!! I’ll be there if they do!

Saw Journey in 1981 at the Pasadena Rose Bowl. What a show.

I dont thnk it will happen due to legal action brought by SP with regard to trademark isssues that recently surfaced.PP

Steve Perry is absolutely amazing no doubt about that, but lets also recognize how great of a guitar player Neal is & how great of a piano/keyboardist Jonathan Cain is, they all had great chemistry as musicians. Just superb musicians/singers. I hope they can reunit all the classic lineup.

I would move Heaven and Earth to see Steve Perry with Journey again! I saw them in 1981 and that was the best show ever! This would be the reunion of a lifetime and I won’t miss it!!

I with all of you Steve Perry is Journey he is the VOICE OF JOURNEY and I pray to God that I get to see them one more time all together before I die.

Mixed feelings. The Steve of today doesn’t sound anywhere near the Steve of 40 years ago. Steve USED to be the man but Arnel is the better of the two in 2022 IMO

I am waiting for you Steve Perry please join the tour 2023

I am waiting for you Steve Perry please join the tour 2023 🙂

snuck in to their concert in 1982, worked for Neil in 1994, told him, he said thats why Im 10 dollars short

I saw Steve Perry perform twice and I would not see journey without him Steve is journey bring him back forget the drama give the Fans what they want

Love to see Steve with journey hell yell

JOURNEY GETTING BACK TOGETHER WOULD BE LIKE…..CHRISTMAS, EASTER AND MY BIRTHDAY ALL AT ONCE !!!!!!!!!!!!! AFTER ALL STEVE PERRY IS AND WILL ALWAYS BE…..JOURNEY………………………….LIKE THE SONG SAYS……………….”DON’T STOP BELIEVIN” !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PLEASE MAKE IT SO……………..I HAVE WAITED MY ENTIRE LIFE AND EVEN MY MOTHER, MARY….WHO JUST PASSED AWAY……….WAS EXCITED. I KNOW SHE IS WATCHIN” AND HOPING AS WELL.

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Arnel Pineda on JOURNEY’s Potential Reunion with Steve Perry and Career Impact

via GIGS / YouTube

In a chat with Rolling Stone, Arnel Pineda, the frontman of the iconic band Journey, shared his thoughts on the possibility of reuniting with the former lead singer, Steve Perry. Pineda, known for his upbeat personality and powerful vocals, revealed his openness to the idea, sparking excitement among fans.

Dreamy Encounter with an Icon: Arnel Meets Steve Perry

Expressing his amazement at the unexpected encounter with Perry, Pineda shared,

“I posted on Instagram that I had waited 35 years for that. It was dreamy. I couldn’t believe I met him since he’s very reclusive and he avoids people.”

Pineda reflected on the profound influence Perry had on him, stating,

“He’s one of my heroes when it comes to singing. I remember back in the ’80s, I would sleep on the bus with my Walkman on in my ears as his voice sang all these favorite songs from Journey.”

  View this post on Instagram Modafinil 5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;”>   A post shared by Journey (@journeyofficial)

A Career Sacrifice for the Love of Perry and Journey

When asked about the possibility of Perry’s return and the impact on his role in the band, Pineda responded,

“I miss them so much together. Every now and then, I watch their videos together. It’s always them with Steve Perry that I watch.”

Acknowledging the sentiment of fans who proclaim, “No Perry, No Journey,” Pineda sympathized,

“I understand it. Where I come from, we’re so influenced by Western music. We loved the originals, if you know what I mean.”

Addressing the potential impact on his career, Pineda shared a surprising perspective,

“That would be OK to me! I’m telling you. That’s how much I adore him and I adore Journey and how much I adore Steve Perry.”

  View this post on Instagram   A post shared by Retro and Nostalgia Creator (@70sandbeyond)

Anticipation for the Future: Pineda’s Genuine Enthusiasm

Recounting a personal anecdote, Pineda revealed,

“Back in 2005, I resigned from my job in Hong Kong because I lost my voice due to acid reflux. I was telling my friends back then that my only regret was I lost my voice before I had the chance to sing side-by-side with Steve Perry.”

He continued,

“I just wish that one show with him… it would change my life forever. It’s been 30 years now, and the band keeps changing my life in ways nobody would ever guess would happen.”

Arnel Pineda’s genuine admiration for Steve Perry and his eagerness for a potential reunion add a layer of anticipation to Journey’s future. As fans speculate on what could be, Pineda’s words reflect the profound impact that music and collaboration can have on an artist’s journey, transcending the boundaries of time.

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50 years in, the Journey journey is far from over.

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame group just announced their 50th anniversary ‘Freedom Tour’ with special guest Toto that will send them to arenas all over North America from February through April 2024.

That includes a stop at Rochester, NY’s Blue Cross Arena on Thursday, Feb. 22.

“We are looking forward to hitting the road again with our very good friends Toto,” Journey guitarist and co-founder Neal Schon said in a press release. “Come join us for a special evening full of fun and rockin’ good memories.”

And if you need tickets to hear “Don’t Stop Believin’,” “Faithfully,” “Lights,” “Separate Ways,” “Wheel In The Sky” and so many more timeless hits today, we’re help to help you find them “Any Way You Want It.”

Although inventory isn’t available on Ticketmaster until Friday, Sept. 29, fans who want to ensure they have tickets ahead of time can  purchase on sites like Vivid Seats  before tickets are officially on sale.

Vivid Seats is a secondary market ticketing platform, and prices may be higher or lower than face value, depending on demand.

They have a 100% buyer guarantee that states your transaction will be safe and secure and will be delivered before the event.

Journey 2024 tour schedule

A complete calendar including all tour dates, venues and links to buy tickets for all upcoming concerts can be found below.

Journey set list

With so many hits under their belt, you may be wondering what Journey plays at their live shows.

Although we can’t tell you for certain what they’ll perform at their 2024 concerts, here’s a look at what they busted out at most 2023 gigs, courtesy of Set List FM .

01.) “Only the Young”

02.) “Stone in Love” 03.) “Don’t Stop Believin'” 04.) “Lights” 05.) “Send Her My Love” 06.) “Escape” 07.) “Chain Reaction” 08.) “Who’s Crying Now” 09.) “Mother, Father” 10.) “Let It Rain” 11.) “Lovin’, Touchin’, Squeezin'” 12.) “Open Arms” 13.) “Faithfully” 14.) “Girl Can’t Help It” 15.) “Wheel in the Sky” 16.) “Separate Ways (Worlds Apart)”

17.) “Be Good to Yourself” 18.) “Any Way You Want It”

Journey band members

50 years together is nothing to sneeze at.

As a result, there’s been a bit of turnover since the band’s start way back in the ’70s.

For a closer look, here’s who you’ll likely see onstage at a ‘Freedom’ concert next year:

Neal Schon: lead guitar, backing vocals (1973–1987, 1991, 1995–) Jonathan Cain: keyboards, piano, backing vocals, rhythm guitar, harmonica (1980–1987, 1991, 1995–) Deen Castronovo: drums, backing and lead vocals (1998–2015, 2021–) Arnel Pineda: lead vocals (2007–) Jason Derlatka: keyboards, backing and lead vocals (2019–) Todd Jensen: bass, backing vocals (2021–)[138]

Journey new music

In 2022, Journey dropped their 16th studio album “Freedom.”

The 73-minute record is comprised of 15 songs that all harken back to the band’s glory years.

Anthemic choruses, soaring guitar solos and heartfelt ballads litter the record.

For our money, the hard rockin’ “You Got The Best Of Me” is the highlight of “Freedom” although the catchy “All Day And All Night” comes in a close second.

Want to hear the record for yourself?

You can listen to “Freedom” in its entirety here.

Steve Lukather’s long-running rock group are headliners in their own right.

Most will know them for their smash singles like “Africa,” “Rosanna” and “Hold The Line” but their catalog runs much deeper than that.

Over the course of their six decades (!) together, they’ve released 14 albums with the most recent hitting shelves in 20128.

If you’d like to brush up on their output, you can find Toto’s complete discography here.

Classic rockers on tour in 2023-24

Many Rock and Roll Hall of Famers never stopped believing and are still out and about.

Here are just five of our favorites you won’t want to miss these next few months.

•  Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band

•  The Eagles

• Aerosmith

•  Billy Joel

•  Stevie Nicks

Who else is touring? Check out our list of the 22 biggest classic rockers on tour in 2023 here to find out.

Prefer slightly more modern music? We compiled the 107 biggest ’80s stars on tour in 2023 too.

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How to Reunite After a Breakup: 8 Crucial Steps in the Journey

Last Updated: March 15, 2024 Fact Checked

Stages of Reconnecting with an Ex

Is getting back together a good idea, when to not get back together, advice to make it last this time, should i get back with my ex.

This article was co-authored by Allen Wagner, MFT, MA and by wikiHow staff writer, Madeleine Flamiano . Allen Wagner is a licensed marriage and family therapist based in Los Angeles, California. He received his Master's in Psychology from Pepperdine University in 2004. He specializes in working with individuals and couples on ways they can improve their relationships. Along with his wife, Talia Wagner, he's the author of Married Roommates. There are 16 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources. This article has been viewed 9,759 times.

Not ready to close the book on your love story? While breakups can be heart-breaking, there's no guarantee that yours means it's "game over." With the right strategies, some clever tricks, and perfect timing, you can win your way back into your ex's life. In fact, you might even reboot your relationship. Here, we'll guide you through the process of scoring your ex back and playing for keeps. So, get ready to walk down memory lane and into a bright future with your old flame!

Things You Should Know

• Go "no contact" for 30 days to keep your ex wondering and fantasizing about you.
• Re-establish contact with a chill, low-stakes opener to test the waters with your ex.
• Use your time to genuinely reconnect if you score your first "post-breakup" date.
• Practice open communication if you both decide to start regularly seeing each other.

• Traditionally, the "no contact rule" is used to move on from an ex, so your old flame might worry that you slipped through their fingers.
• If you stay strong and follow this rule by the book (that means not even one random text), you'll create a sense of mystery and anticipation.
• Not only does the "no contact" rule allow your ex some time to wonder if ending the relationship was the wrong choice, but it also allows you time to regroup so you'll be calm and collected when you eventually speak again.

• Make a list of what you loved and disliked about your relationship. For example, jot down, "He was always great at giving me lots of compliments and supporting my dreams. I just wish that we had more novelty in our dynamic and went on more dates."
• Review what you wrote down to see if you want to move forward: "You know, all of this seems very surmountable. He was a really nice guy, and I bet if I handled the logistics, he would be down to go to more concerts or vacations."
• Remember to prioritize your own self-care , too. Not only will you enjoy yourself, but when you brim with confidence, your ex may find you irresistible if you meet up again.

• Identify your attachment style —were you ever distant and avoidant? On the other hand, did you ever feel like you needed continual reassurance because you were insecure about the relationship?
• Think about your love languages—did each of you express affection in the same way? Did you show your partner a lot of appreciation, or did you sometimes overlook the positive ways they contributed to the relationship?
• Consider your communication skills —did you speak up about what you needed, or did you sweep your concerns under the rug? Did you discuss matters calmly, and were you an active listener?

• Try to sound like it's no big deal to you: "Hey, stranger. 😊 Is it cool to text?"
• For a few days, or even a couple weeks, just give random updates: "Work is finally settling down, yay!" Then, bring up a low-stakes way to meet up again: "What do you think about grabbing coffee? ☕I'm free on Saturday."
• If they're not ready to hang out yet (or express that they'd rather not stay in touch), respect their wishes: "I completely understand. I wish you the best."
• Reader Poll: We asked 722 wikiHow readers and only 9% of them would reach out to an ex by calling and sharing their feelings. [Take Poll] So a casual, pressure-free text or email may be the best way to re-establish contact.

• Even if they look totally yummy, stick to respectful and polite openers, like, "You look great. How's everything been for you these days?"
• Feel free to indulge in a little nostalgia to sweeten the date: "You are so funny! I love how we can always goof off with each other. Remember how wild we got at that wedding?"
• To keep the sparks flying, thank them for coming out and suggest another meetup: "I had a blast. Wanna get together next weekend?"

• Decide whether you need more time to find your groove or if you'd like to be "official" again: "I think I'm ready to put a 'relationship' label on this. It just feels right to me. What are your thoughts?"
• Speak up about your needs: "Now that we're together again, I just want to make sure we stay invested in each other. I'd love if we could have two special date nights every month."
• Check in about what your former ex wants: "I know that you really value your personal space. I just wanted to reassure you that I'll totally respect that. It's important for both of us to enjoy our independence!"

• If you two are slipping into old patterns, gently bring this up and offer a solution: "It seems that we're getting a little distant again. I really love you and want to avoid drifting apart. Why don't we talk it out, cuddle, and watch a movie tonight?"
• When you two have made amazing strides, shine a light on that: "We're doing so much better this time around! Look at us resolving problems like total pros."
• Take time to regularly assess your relationship: "Overall, I'm really happy we got back together. I know issues will always come up, but I know we'll handle them, babe."

• If people ask about your breakup, you can just say something like, "It's been an awesome journey. We were in love the entire time, and we overcame everything together."
• Show how appreciative you are to keep the romance alive: "I'm glad you weren't the one that got away. My life is better because you're back in it."

• If you catch them regularly checking out your social media, it's a good sign they feel nostalgic and are really interested in staying in touch with you.

• Making promises without ever following through. For example, your partner might reassure you they'll remain open and transparent, but they still keep secrets from you.
• Setting unrealistic standards for a "fantasy" relationship. If either of you spend more time describing how you wish each other would be like rather than accepting one another, then it's a sign you'll both remain unsatisfied.
• Playing the "blame game" and bringing up past mistakes. If one of you still hasn't let go of what's already said and done, then arguments will continue to crop up. Plus, accusations, jealousy, or frustration chip away at a relationship.

• Play around with body language, too—for example, when you speak with your partner, lean in and caress them to build the sexual tension.

Expert Q&A

You might also like.

• ↑ https://exbackpermanently.com/to-do-after-no-contact/
• ↑ https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/how-to/how-to-win-someone-back-the-ultimate-guide/
• ↑ https://www.rewire.org/back-in-touch-with-ex/
• ↑ https://www.rewire.org/getting-back-with-an-ex-right/
• ↑ https://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/health/healthyliving/relationships-and-communication
• ↑ https://extension.usu.edu/strongermarriage/blog/10-relationship-checkup-questions
• ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/finding-new-home/202011/the-right-way-express-gratitude-in-relationships
• ↑ https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/relations/should-i-talk-to-my-ex-or-stay-away/
• ↑ https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2022/12/second-chance-relationships-getting-back-together-with-exes/672474/
• ↑ https://psychcentral.com/lib/symptoms-signs-of-codependency
• ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/steps-to-end-a-toxic-relationship
• ↑ https://www.loveisrespect.org/resources/types-of-abuse/
• ↑ https://www.apa.org/topics/marriage-relationships/healthy-relationships
• ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/stronger-the-broken-places/202009/falling-in-love-again-and-again
• ↑ https://www.thehealthy.com/sex/how-to-spice-up-your-sex-life/
• ↑ https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/gratitude_is_for_lovers

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What to Ask Yourself Before Getting Back Together with An Ex

Before jumping back in with an old flame, consider these 3 questions..

Posted August 16, 2022 | Reviewed by Devon Frye

• After a breakup, it's very common to think about getting back together.
• Before you rekindle a relationship with an old flame, it's helpful to consider your true motivation for getting back together.
• If neither you nor your ex have changed significantly since the breakup, it's unlikely that a future relationship will work.

Never go back to an old love. It’s like a book you’ve already read. You know how it will end. — Unknown

Do you have a former love that you can’t quite get over? Are you considering getting back together?

Many of us do. In a study of almost 800 young adults around age 20, about half reconciled with an ex after an initial breakup (Halpern-Meekin et al., 2013). In addition, over half continued to have a sexual relationship with their ex after breaking up.

If you've recently gone through a breakup, it’s really quite common to think about reconciling with your ex. You may find yourself reminiscing about the blissful moments you shared. Missing them. Thinking about them. Struggling to find your identity without them. Even selectively forgetting why you broke up.

Much of this is because of the nature of breakups—they can shift your lifestyle, self-concept , or even your home in the blink of an eye. Even if you were the one who wanted to end the relationship, breakups can be emotionally heartbreaking and lead you to question your choices (Field, 2017).

Should You Reach Out to Your Ex?

So, is it time to get back together and try again? Can you rekindle with an old flame? Is there really such a thing as “starting anew” with the same person?

Although the answers to these more general questions are complex and depend on your specific situation, it’s still important to ask yourself some direct questions about your motivation for getting back together. Here are a few to get you started:

1. Why did you break up?

There's a reason that your relationship didn't work the last time you dated—perhaps even many reasons! Thus, before getting back with an ex, it's important to honestly think about what led to your breakup. What caused the split itself? Why did your relationship ultimately not work? Try to identify exactly what led your relationship to end the last time you dated.

2. Has anything meaningful changed since your breakup?

If your next relationship with your ex is going to work, it'll only be because something has changed. One or both of you must have shifted and evolved with regard to the issues that broke you up in the first place (as in, your answers to question 1 above must have been addressed!).

Have you changed in ways that lead you to believe it will be different this time? Has your ex changed? Have you adequately addressed what didn’t work the last time you were together? If you haven't, think twice before you try to reconnect.

3. What’s motivating you to get back together?

Since breakups can be so jarring and disruptive to your life, it’s really important that you understand why you want to get back together.

What's your motivation to rekindle this relationship? Is it because you really love your ex? Because you think they're a great person and you want to make it work?

Or is it because you’re lonely ? Bored ? Feeling lost without them? Don’t know who you are or what to do with your life now that they’re gone?

If your desire to get back together is coming from an unhealthy place—like you're struggling to overcome early childhood attachment issues (Cope and Mattingly, 2021) or don't think you could possibly find anyone else—it may be wise to pause before you try to get back together.

The naked truth is this: Like all relationships, navigating love interests—current and former—can be very tricky. If you’re hoping to start anew with an ex, remember that it’s not really like starting a new relationship; you have an understanding and history with your ex that will influence your dynamic in the future.

That said, it’s possible to develop a new relationship with an ex that’s functional and healthy—as long as something has shifted. If you do try to start anew, start by being clear about what didn't work in the past and clearly shift your expectations, behavior, and lifestyle to address it.

Copyright Cortney S. Warren, Ph.D., ABPP

Note: I cannot respond to personal requests for advice over the internet. Best on your continued journey.

Cope MA and Mattingly BA. 2021. Putting me back together by getting back together: Post-dissolution self-concept confusion predicts rekindling desire among anxiously attached individuals. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships,38, 384-392.

Field, T. 2017. Romantic Breakup Distress, Betrayal and Heartbreak: A Review. International Journal of Behavioral Research and Psychology 5: 217–25.

Halpern-Meekin S, Manning WD, Giordano PC, Longmore MA. 2013. Relationship Churning in Emerging Adulthood: On/Off Relationships and Sex with an Ex. J Adolesc Res, 28:166-188.

Cortney Warren, Ph.D., ABPP , is a clinical psychologist and adjunct professor of psychiatry at the University of Nevada Las Vegas (UNLV). She is also the author of Letting Go of Your Ex and Lies We Tell Ourselves.

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Is The Band Journey Getting Back Together 2023?

Curious to know if the band Journey getting back together. Read on to find out more.

Journey was still an active band, although their lineup has undergone changes over the years. Neal Schon and Jonathan Cain have been the core members for a long time, and they’ve had different lead vocalists, including Steve Perry, Arnel Pineda, and others.

• Related: Why Did Arnel Pineda Leave Journey?
• Related: How Many Lead Singers Has Journey Had?

Is The Band Journey Getting Back Together

Overview of the band journey’s history and lineup changes.

Journey is an American rock band that was formed in 1973 in San Francisco. The band has experienced several lineup changes over the years. Here’s an overview of their history and key lineup changes:

Original Formation (1973):

• Neal Schon (guitar)
• Gregg Rolie (keyboards, vocals)
• Ross Valory (bass)
• George Tickner (guitar)
• Prairie Prince (drums)

Early Years (1973-1977): Journey’s early years saw moderate success, but it wasn’t until their fourth studio album, “Infinity” (1978), that they achieved mainstream popularity.

First Major Lineup Change (1977):

• Aynsley Dunbar replaced Prairie Prince as the drummer.

The Peak Years (1978-1985): 

During this period, Journey enjoyed their greatest commercial success and became one of the most popular rock bands of the late ’70s and ’80s.

• Steve Perry joined as the lead vocalist in 1978, replacing Robert Fleischman. Perry’s powerful voice became one of the defining features of Journey’s sound.
• With the classic lineup in place, Journey released a series of highly successful albums, including “Infinity” (1978), “Evolution” (1979), “Departure” (1980), “Escape” (1981), and “Frontiers” (1983).
• Notable hits from this era include “Don’t Stop Believin’,” “Open Arms,” “Separate Ways (Worlds Apart),” “Wheel in the Sky,” and “Faithfully.”

Second Major Lineup Change (1985):

• Steve Perry left Journey in 1985 after the “Raised on Radio” album, pursuing a solo career.

Post-Perry Era (1986-1995): 

After Perry’s departure, Journey went through a period of experimentation and lineup changes as they sought a new lead singer.

• Steve Augeri joined as the lead vocalist in 1998, staying with the band until 2006.
• Jeff Scott Soto briefly filled in as lead vocalist in 2006 before being replaced by Arnel Pineda in 2007.

Reunion with Arnel Pineda (2007-present):  

With Arnel Pineda as the lead vocalist, Journey experienced a revitalization and regained popularity.

• The band released the album “Revelation” in 2008, which featured new material along with re-recorded classics.
• The journey continued to tour extensively and release new albums, maintaining their status as a successful and iconic rock band.

Key Members as of now:

• Jonathan Cain (keyboards, rhythm guitar)
• Steve Smith (drums)
• Arnel Pineda (lead vocals)

Historical Context of Journey’s Breakup

The journey has experienced several breakups and lineup changes throughout its history. One of the most significant breakups in Journey’s career occurred in 1987, following the release of their album “ Raised on Radio .”

The breakup in 1987 can be attributed to several factors:

• Creative Differences: The band members, particularly the core songwriters Jonathan Cain, Neal Schon, and Steve Perry, had different visions for the musical direction of the band. 

After a highly successful run in the late ’70s and ’80s, tensions arose as they struggled to agree on the style and content of their music.

• Steve Perry’s Departure: Steve Perry, the iconic lead vocalist known for his distinctive voice and emotional performances, left the band in 1985 after the “Raised on Radio” album. 

His decision to depart was driven by personal and creative reasons. Perry wanted to explore a solo career and was also dealing with personal challenges, including health issues and the death of his mother.

• Exhaustion from Extensive Touring: Journey had been on the road consistently for years, and the rigors of touring took a toll on the band members, leading to fatigue and burnout.
• Changing Music Landscape: The late 1980s marked a shifting musical landscape, with new genres and styles gaining popularity. 

Journey’s brand of melodic rock faced competition from other genres, and the music industry was undergoing significant changes.

After the breakup in 1987, the band members pursued their separate projects and musical endeavors. It was a turbulent time for the group, and they remained apart for several years.

Journey experienced various reunions and lineup changes in the subsequent years, including the return of several original members and the recruitment of new lead singers. 

Despite the challenges and changes, Journey’s music continued to resonate with fans, and they remained a popular live act with a devoted following.

As with any band’s history, the dynamics of interpersonal relationships, creative differences, and changes in the music industry can all play a role in breakups and lineup changes.

• Related: Why Did Steve Perry Leave Journey?

Solo Projects and Collaborations of Former Band Members of Journey

Several former members of Journey have pursued solo projects and collaborations outside of the band. Here are some notable examples:

Steve Perry: After leaving Journey in 1985, Steve Perry embarked on a successful solo career. He released several solo albums, including “Street Talk” (1984), “For the Love of Strange Medicine” (1994), and “Traces” (2018). “Traces” marked Perry’s return to music after a long hiatus and received critical acclaim.

Neal Schon: Journey’s founding member and guitarist, Neal Schon, has released several solo albums throughout his career. 

Some of his solo works include “Late Nite” (1989), “Beyond the Thunder” (1995), and “The Calling” (2012). Schon has also collaborated with various artists on different projects.

Jonathan Cain: Journey’s keyboardist and rhythm guitarist, Jonathan Cain, has released solo albums, including “Back to the Innocence” (1995) and “Where I Live” (2006). Cain has also been involved in songwriting and collaborations with other artists.

Gregg Rolie: Gregg Rolie, Journey’s original keyboardist and co-lead vocalist, pursued a solo career after leaving Journey. 

He released several solo albums, such as “Gregg Rolie” (1985) and “Roots” (2001). Rolie has also been a member of other bands, including Santana.

Steve Smith: Journey’s drummer, Steve Smith, has been involved in various solo projects and collaborations. He released albums with his band Vital Information and has worked with numerous jazz and fusion musicians.

Ross Valory: Journey’s longtime bassist, Ross Valory, has participated in various musical endeavors outside of Journey. He has collaborated with other musicians and contributed to different projects.

What genre is Journey?

Journey is primarily known as a rock band. They have had a significant impact on the rock music scene and are considered one of the iconic bands in the history of rock music. 

Their style blends various rock subgenres, including arena rock, AOR, classic rock, and melodic rock, making them a versatile and influential force in the rock genre.

Who owns Journey’s band?

The ownership of the band Journey is not a straightforward concept, as it involves multiple entities and individuals. 

Journey is made up of several members, each of whom has a stake in the band. The band’s music and brand are likely owned by various record labels, publishers, and management companies.

The core members of Journey, such as Neal Schon, Jonathan Cain, and Ross Valory, have significant ownership interests in the band and its music. 

Steve Perry, despite being a former member, might also have ownership rights to some of the band’s earlier works.

Furthermore, the ownership of the band’s music and intellectual property may be shared with their record label, which, depending on the album release and contractual agreements, could be Sony Music, Columbia Records, or other affiliated companies.

Who is the new Journey band manager?

Mike Kobayashi was indeed the manager of the rock band Journey. Mike Kobayashi has been a long-time manager for Journey and has played a significant role in the band’s career and business affairs.

What made Journey popular?

Journey’s popularity and long-lasting success as a rock band can be attributed to several key factors. They gained widespread appeal due to their ability to create catchy and melodic songs with memorable hooks and sing-along choruses. 

Steve Perry’s powerful and distinctive vocals became a defining element of their sound, resonating deeply with audiences.

Their music’s compatibility with the Album-Oriented Rock (AOR) radio format helped them reach a broader audience and receive substantial airplay. 

Moreover, Journey’s catalog featured a collection of timeless ballads, including “Open Arms,” “Faithfully,” and “Lights,” which further endeared them to fans and contributed to their lasting legacy.

Beyond studio recordings, Journey’s reputation as a must-see live act stemmed from their energetic and captivating performances, establishing a strong connection with their audiences. 

They consistently released successful albums, such as “Infinity” (1978), “Escape” (1981), and “Frontiers” (1983), gaining praise from both fans and critics alike.

Furthermore, their contributions to soundtracks and placements in various movies, TV shows, and commercials ensured their music remained relevant and continued to resonate with new generations of listeners.

Despite undergoing lineup changes, Journey displayed resilience and adaptability, staying relevant to different musical trends. 

Their extensive global touring efforts enabled them to build a dedicated international fan base, solidifying their place as one of the most successful and cherished rock bands in music history.

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30 songs about getting back together & reunited love.

Whether it’s after a fight, a breakup, or a long time apart, reuniting with your special someone is an incomparable feeling. 

It’s no wonder, that some of the best songs ever written are about getting back together. 

From classic hits like “Endless Love” to modern favorites like “A Thousand Years,” these tunes capture all the emotions of reuniting with someone you can’t live without. 

So, without further ado let’s start our list of the 30 best songs about getting back together.

Table of Contents

1. “Love On Top” by Beyoncé

“Love On Top” by Beyoncé is a soulful, upbeat track that was released as part of her fourth studio album, 4 in September 2011. 

The song showcases Beyoncé’s powerful vocals and features a retro-inspired sound. 

It was widely praised by fans and critics alike and became one of the standout tracks on 4 .

2. “Picture” By Kid Rock ft. Sheryl Crow

This song was released as a single in 2001 and became one of Kid Rock’s biggest hits. 

The song is a crossover between country and rock, blending Kid Rock’s trademark rapping style with Sheryl Crow’s soulful vocals. 

The song’s lyrics tell the story of a couple looking back on their relationship through a photo album and reflecting on the ups and downs they’ve experienced together.

3. “Whatever It Takes” by Lifehouse

The song captures the feeling of wanting to do whatever it takes to patch up a relationship that’s been broken.

Written by lead singer, Jason Wade, “Whatever It Takes” speaks of determination and hope that the two lovers can find their way back to each other, the song was released in 2007.

4. “Let’s Stay Together” by Al Green

“ Let’s Stay Together ” was released in 1971 and was included on Al Green’s album of the same name. 

The song was recorded at the legendary Hi Records studio in Memphis, Tennessee, and was produced by Willie Mitchell. 

Al Green had already established himself as a soul star in the early 1970s, but “Let’s Stay Together” marked a new peak in his career and became one of his signature songs.

5. “Baby Come Back” by Player

It was released in 1977 and became the band’s biggest hit, reaching the top 5 on the US pop charts and earning widespread critical acclaim. 

The song features a catchy melody, upbeat rhythm, and emotional lyrics about lost love and the singer’s desire to get that person back. 

The song’s lush production, featuring smooth harmonies and intricate guitar work, helped establish Player as one of the leading soft rock bands of the late 1970s.

6. “Never Really Over” by Katy Perry

This patch-up song is about someone who has gone through heartache and is finally reuniting with the one they love. 

It’s a perfect love song for anyone struggling to move on from a difficult relationship, but wanting to reunite with their special someone in the end. 

Its honest lyrics and beautiful melody make it an ideal choice for any occasion when you’re looking to reconnect with your special someone.

7. “Escape (The Piña Colada Song)” by Rupert Holmes

The song was released in 1979 and became an instant sensation, reaching the top of the charts in several countries and capturing the hearts of music lovers everywhere. 

The song remains a staple of oldies radio and nostalgia playlists, and its popularity shows no signs of waning. 

It is a true testament to Rupert Holmes’ talents as a songwriter and performer and a reminder of the timeless appeal of great pop music.

8. “I Won’t Give Up” by Jason Mraz

It was released in 2012 as the lead single from his fourth studio album, Love is a Four Letter Word . 

The song has a pop and folk-inspired sound and is known for its upbeat melody and positive lyrics about perseverance and never giving up on love. 

It was well-received by audiences and has become one of Mraz’s most popular songs to date.

9. “Austin” by Blake Shelton

The song was a commercial success, reaching the top of the Billboard Hot Country Songs chart and becoming Shelton’s first number-one hit. 

“Austin” is a mid-tempo ballad that tells the story of a man who is torn between staying in a relationship or moving to Austin, Texas, to pursue his dreams. 

The song is known for its emotional vocals and nostalgic, yearning lyrics.

10. “Open Arms” by Journey

Journey was formed in San Francisco in 1973 and rose to fame in the late 1970s and early 1980s as a leading band of the arena rock genre. 

“Open Arms” was released in 1981 as a single from their seventh studio album Escape . 

Written by keyboardist Jonathan Cain, “Open Arms” is among Journey’s most successful and recognizable songs. 

It was a hit in the United States, reaching the top of the Billboard Adult Contemporary chart

11. “Looks Like We Made It” by Barry Manilow

Patching up broken relationships is a tricky task but it can be made easier with the right song. 

This classic love song paints a picture of two former lovers who have been apart for a while but are now reconciling and reuniting their love. 

Whether you’re in your twenties or your sixties, “Looks Like We Made It” will make you feel like you can get through any rough patch.

12. “Change My Mind” by One Direction

One Direction was formed in 2010 as part of the British television talent show “The X Factor”. 

The band quickly gained popularity and became a prominent boy band of the 2010s, With their good looks and charming personalities, One Direction won over fans around the world.

“Change My Mind” was released as a track on their second studio album, Take Me Home in 2012.

13. “We Belong Together” by Mariah Carey

The song features a soulful, R&B-influenced melody and emotive vocals by Carey. 

The lyrics describe the pain and heartbreak of a broken relationship, with Carey singing about her desire to be reunited with her former lover. 

Written and produced by Carey along with rapper/producer Jermaine Dupri, “We Belong Together” was a commercial success, reaching the top of the Billboard Hot 100 chart and becoming Carey’s sixteenth number-one hit in the United States.

14. “Lego House” by Ed Sheeran

It is a soulful and introspective ballad that takes listeners on a journey through the fragments of a broken relationship. 

This mid-tempo folk-pop masterpiece features an acoustic guitar-driven melody that serves as the perfect backdrop for Sheeran’s heartfelt lyrics. 

“Lego House” is an example of the incredible artistry and talent that Ed Sheeran brings to the table.

15. “Hard To Say I’m Sorry” by Chicago

Released in 1982, “Hard To Say I’m Sorry” was a single off Chicago’s 15th studio album, Chicago 16 . 

It is a powerful song about reuniting love and pleading with someone to fix things up and start again. 

The song was an instant hit, reaching number one on the Billboard Hot 100 and earning them a Grammy Award for best pop performance by a duo or group with Vocals.

16. “The Reason” by Hoobastank

“The Reason” is a love song from Hoobastank’s second album, The Reason . 

The deep lyrics, emotion-filled vocals, and beat make it a classic reuniting love song that many people can relate to. 

It has won multiple awards, including being nominated for a Grammy for Best Pop Performance by a Duo or Group with Vocal. 

The song remains a staple on radio stations and continues to inspire fans to rekindle old romances or give another chance to someone special.

17. “The Scientist” by Coldplay

In “The Scientist”, lead singer Chris Martin sings about a past relationship that ended in heartbreak and his desire to go back in time and try to make things right. 

The song’s tender and emotional lyrics, combined with its simple yet powerful melody. 

Coldplay is a legendary band known for its introspective and emotionally charged alternative rock.

18. “Bringing Back The Sunshine” by Blake Shelton

Blake Shelton is a country music icon who has been entertaining audiences for over two decades. 

“Bringing Back The Sunshine” was released by Blake Shelton in 2014 as the title track of his ninth studio album. 

The upbeat and optimistic track features a catchy chorus and lyrics that celebrate the simple joys of life and the power of love to chase away the blues.

19. “Always On My Mind” by Willie Nelson

“Always on My Mind” is a classic country ballad written by Johnny Christopher, Mark James, and Wayne Carson. 

It was first recorded by B.J. Thomas in 1970, but it was Willie Nelson’s 1982 rendition that brought the song widespread fame. 

The song is an emotional expression of love and regret, as the singer reflects on a failed relationship and wishes that he had shown his love more clearly. 

20. “Miss You” by The Rolling Stones

The song describes the longing and heartache of being apart from a loved one and the hope of being able to fix things up. 

The song was a number-one hit in the US and UK, winning numerous awards worldwide.

21. “Cool” by Gwen Stefani

“Cool” is a mid-tempo, electropop, and new wave-influenced song that features a synth-based beat and a catchy chorus. 

The song’s lyrics revolve around the theme of moving on from a relationship and feeling “cool” about it. 

Upon its release, “Cool” received positive reviews from music critics, who praised its catchy chorus and upbeat production. 

The song was also commercially successful, peaking at number ten on the US Billboard Hot 100 and reaching the top twenty in several other countries.

22. “Trainwreck” by Demi Lovato

“Trainwreck” is a standout track from Demi Lovato’s sixth studio album Tell Me You Love Me . 

The music video for “Trainwreck” is just as impactful as the song itself. 

It was directed by Hannah Lux Davis and features Lovato singing the song.

23. “Old Flame” by Arcade Fire

The song was released in 2004 on the band’s award-winning album Funeral . 

The lyrics are all about reconnecting with an old flame and finding their way back to each other despite all the struggles they have gone through. 

In 2005, it was nominated for Best Rock Performance by a Duo or Group at the 47th Annual Grammy Awards. 

The song is a great example of a song about getting back together and remains an iconic classic to this day. 

24. “Before You Walk Out Of My Life” by Monica

The song’s lyrics revolve around the theme of trying to save a relationship on the brink of falling apart, and Monica pleads with her partner not to leave her. 

The song’s beautiful vocals and relatable lyrics made it a hit with fans, and it remains one of Monica’s most well-known songs to this day. 

The song peaked at number eight on the US Billboard Hot 100 chart. 

25. “You Are The Sunshine Of My Life” by Stevie Wonder

“You Are The Sunshine Of My Life” was released as a single from Stevie Wonder’s 1972 album Talking Book .

The song was written by Wonder and produced by him and Robert Margouleff. 

“You Are the Sunshine of My Life” is an upbeat, soulful ballad that showcases Stevie Wonder’s signature sound and signature vocal style.

The song’s lyrics are a love letter to the person who brings joy and happiness into the singer’s life

26. “Closer” by The Chainsmokers

This popular 2016 hit is one of the best songs about getting back together. 

Its upbeat rhythm and heartfelt lyrics make it the perfect reuniting love song. 

The song tells the story of two people who have gone their separate ways but still have feelings for one another.

27. “Love Don’t Run” by Steve Holy

This song captures the heart of those who have endured a breakup and are working to get back together.

It’s a great song to listen to while you’re working on getting back with your special one, as it talks about all the feelings that come with making up after an argument or fight. 

The lyrics emphasize that even when two people break up, the love is still strong, and it will never run away.

28. “I Want You Back” by The Jackson 5

It’s an energetic and cheerful love song that will get stuck in your head with its bouncy rhythm. 

The lyrics describe a love that was once lost and is now found. 

The singer expresses his regret for ever letting the other person go, and expresses his desire to make it right.

29. “Hold Back The River” by James Bay

“Hold Back the River” was released as a single from James Bay’s debut studio album Chaos and the Calm in 2014. 

The song was written by Bay and produced by Jacquire King. 

Upon its release, “Hold Back the River” was a hit, and it became a commercial success, reaching the top ten in several countries and earning Bay numerous accolades and awards.

30. “Un-Break My Heart” by Toni Braxton

Toni Braxton’s 1997 hit, “Un-Break My Heart” is a song about the heartbreak and longing for a former lover and the hope of patching up their broken relationship. 

It’s no wonder why this song continues to be so popular, it captures that bittersweet emotion that comes from reuniting with an old flame perfectly. 

The song paints a vivid picture of what it feels like to have one’s heart broken and the hope of getting back together.

Songs About Getting Back Together – Final Thoughts

When it comes to songs about getting back together with your loved one, there is no shortage of amazing tunes out there. 

There is something for everyone looking for that perfect patch-up song or love song to show their special someone just how much they care. 

Whether you need a little help getting the spark back into your relationship, or just want to celebrate reuniting with an old flame, these songs about getting back together are sure to bring out all the feels.

Will Fenton

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19 Songs About Reuniting and Getting Back Together

In this article, you’ll discover a compilation of 19 songs that perfectly capture the essence of reuniting and getting back together. From soulful R&B to catchy pop, powerful rock, and smooth jazz, there’s a little something for every musical taste. With chart-topping hits like Toni Braxton’s “Un-break My Heart,” Janet Jackson’s “Again,” and Journey’s “Open Arms,” these songs eloquently express the joy and longing that come with reconnecting with loved ones. Whether you’re planning a reunion with friends, a cherished family gathering, or just want to relive the fond memories of a past relationship, this article reminds us of the significant role music plays in creating unforgettable moments. So grab a pen and paper, and get ready to curate the perfect playlist for your next reunion.

Reuniting Through Music: A Playlist of Songs About Getting Back Together

Music has the incredible power to evoke emotions, heal wounds, and bring people together. It can capture the essence of a moment, a feeling, or even a desire. In the vast landscape of music, there is a diverse array of songs that beautifully express the emotion of reuniting and getting back together. Whether it’s the heart-wrenching R&B ballads, the upbeat pop anthems, the soulful jazz tunes, or the electrifying rock classics, these songs hold a special place in our hearts. In this article, we will take you on a journey through different genres, exploring songs that resonate with the theme of reuniting and reigniting old flames.

I. R&B Songs

When it comes to capturing the depths of emotions, R&B stands out as a genre that excels in delivering heartfelt narratives through soulful vocals and powerful melodies. These songs not only reflect the pain of separation but also the longing and hope for a second chance at love. Here are three R&B songs that embrace the theme of reuniting:

1. “Un-break My Heart” by Toni Braxton

Toni Braxton’s iconic ballad, “Un-break My Heart,” is an absolute classic when it comes to expressing the intense desire to mend a broken relationship. Her soulful voice tells a story of heartbreak and the plea to undo past mistakes. With every note, Braxton’s emotive performance takes us on a journey of longing and the hope of rekindling lost love.

2. “Again” by Janet Jackson

“Again,” performed by the legendary Janet Jackson, exemplifies the vulnerability and determination to give love another chance. This timeless ballad showcases Jackson’s impeccable vocals, delivering a tender message of hope and the willingness to start anew. It reminds us that sometimes, love deserves a second act.

3. “End of the Road” by Boyz II Men

Boyz II Men’s “End of the Road” is a heart-wrenching anthem that resonates with anyone who has experienced the pain of a breakup. This R&B masterpiece captures the raw emotions associated with the end of a relationship and the longing to turn things around and go back to the way they used to be. With their flawless harmonies and poignant lyrics, Boyz II Men create a powerful song about the desire to reunite, even when it seems like the end is near.

II. Pop Songs

Pop music has always been a vehicle for catchy melodies and relatable lyrics that resonate with masses. When it comes to songs about reuniting, pop artists have showcased their ability to capture the essence of these emotions and create anthems that celebrate the joy of getting back together. Here are three pop songs that exemplify this theme:

1. “Back Together” by Robin Thicke ft. Nicki Minaj

“Back Together” by Robin Thicke, featuring the talented Nicki Minaj, is an infectious pop track that embodies the spirit of reuniting. With its vibrant beats and catchy chorus, the song encapsulates the excitement and happiness that comes with finding love again. Thicke’s smooth vocals combined with Minaj’s rap verses create a dynamic blend that celebrates the joy of reconciliation.

2. “We Belong Together” by Mariah Carey

Mariah Carey’s “We Belong Together” is an iconic pop ballad that perfectly captures the bittersweet yearning for a lost love. With her powerhouse vocals, Carey croons about the longing to reunite with a former partner. The song’s touching lyrics and soaring melodies resonate deeply, reminding us that love sometimes finds its way back into our lives.

3. “Since U Been Gone” by Kelly Clarkson

Kelly Clarkson’s “Since U Been Gone” is a pop-rock anthem that celebrates the strength and empowerment that can come from a breakup and subsequent reconciliation. This energetic song expresses the exhilaration of moving on, only to realize that the one we truly want is the person we left behind. Clarkson’s powerful vocals and the infectious pop-rock production make this an anthem for anyone who has experienced the joy of reunion.

III. Rock Songs

Rock music, with its raw energy and emotive instrumentals, has consistently produced powerful songs that highlight the joy of reuniting with loved ones. From tender ballads to anthemic rock classics, these songs captivate listeners with their visceral emotions and unbridled passion. Here are three rock songs that reflect the theme of reunification:

1. “Open Arms” by Journey

Journey’s “Open Arms” is a timeless rock ballad that beautifully expresses the vulnerability and immense desire to reunite with a loved one. The evocative lyrics, combined with Steve Perry’s soul-stirring vocals, create an emotional journey that tugs at the heartstrings. “Open Arms” serves as a reminder that love has the power to overcome any obstacle and that reuniting is worth fighting for.

2. “Sweet Child o’ Mine” by Guns N’ Roses

Guns N’ Roses’ classic hit, “Sweet Child o’ Mine,” may not be an obvious choice for a song about reuniting. However, the iconic guitar riff and Axl Rose’s impassioned vocals give this rock anthem a melancholic edge. The lyrics evoke the longing to recapture the purity and innocence of a lost love. “Sweet Child o’ Mine” reminds us that sometimes, rediscovering the love we once had requires us to look back to where it all began.

3. “Patience” by Guns N’ Roses

Another powerful song from Guns N’ Roses, “Patience,” showcases a different side of their musical prowess. With its acoustic guitar melodies and introspective lyrics, the song embodies the sentiment of longing for a reunion. Axl Rose’s heartfelt vocals, combined with the band’s signature harmonies, create a captivating atmosphere that reflects the intensity of desire and the need for patience when it comes to reconnecting with a loved one.

IV. Country Songs

Country music has an unmatched ability to tell stories and evoke powerful emotions. From heartfelt ballads to toe-tapping anthems, country songs about reuniting often touch upon themes of redemption, forgiveness, and the power of love. Here are three country songs that capture the essence of getting back together:

1. “Need You Now” by Lady A

Lady A’s “Need You Now” is a hauntingly beautiful country ballad that delves into the depths of longing and the emptiness that accompanies being apart from a loved one. This Grammy-winning hit showcases the vulnerability and desperation of two people yearning to reunite and conquer their loneliness. The heartfelt vocals and relatable lyrics make “Need You Now” a country classic that resonates with audiences worldwide.

2. “You’re Still the One” by Shania Twain

Shania Twain’s “You’re Still the One” is a timeless country-pop anthem that celebrates lasting love and the power of reconciliation. The song expresses the strength of a relationship that stood the test of time, reminding us that sometimes, getting back together reaffirms the bond we share with our significant other. Twain’s powerful vocals and the infectious melody make this song an enduring testament to the power of love.

3. “If Tomorrow Never Comes” by Garth Brooks

Garth Brooks’ “If Tomorrow Never Comes” is a heartfelt country ballad that serves as a poignant reminder to express our love and reconcile before it’s too late. The song encapsulates the notion that reunification should never be taken for granted and that seizing the opportunity to mend broken bonds is crucial. Brooks’ heartfelt delivery and introspective lyrics strike a chord, urging us to cherish our relationships and embrace the chance to start anew.

V. Jazz Songs

Jazz, often hailed as a genre that effortlessly blends soulful melodies and intricate improvisation, intertwines intricate harmonies with heartfelt lyrics. Jazz songs about reuniting evoke a sense of nostalgia and evoke a longing for the past. Let’s explore three jazz songs that beautifully capture the spirit of reuniting:

1. “The Nearness of You” by Norah Jones

Norah Jones’ rendition of “The Nearness of You” showcases her velvety voice and ability to infuse warmth and tenderness into every note. This timeless jazz standard immerses listeners in a mesmerizing atmosphere of romance and the longing to be reunited with a loved one. Jones’ elegant phrasing and delicate piano accompaniment create a captivating experience that beautifully encapsulates the essence of reuniting.

2. “Let’s Fall in Love” by Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong

“Let’s Fall in Love,” performed by the legendary duo of Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong, is a jazz standard that captures the enchantment and excitement of reuniting with a loved one. This timeless song combines Fitzgerald’s graceful vocals with Armstrong’s soulful trumpet, creating a captivating blend that transports listeners to a world of romance. “Let’s Fall in Love” serves as a reminder of the joy and exhilaration that comes with reconnecting with someone special.

3. “Come Fly with Me” by Frank Sinatra

Frank Sinatra’s “Come Fly with Me” is a jazz classic that embodies the spirit of reuniting and embarking on an adventure with a loved one. The song’s playful lyrics and Sinatra’s charismatic vocals ignite a feeling of joy and anticipation for the journey ahead. “Come Fly with Me” reminds us that reconnecting with a special someone can be an exhilarating and transformative experience that takes us to new heights.

VI. Alternative Songs

Alternative music has always had a unique ability to capture the complexities of human emotions and deliver them with raw honesty and intensity. When it comes to songs about reuniting, alternative artists have masterfully crafted tunes that express the struggles and triumphs of love rediscovered. Here are three alternative songs that delve into the theme of reuniting:

1. “Love Will Tear Us Apart” by Joy Division

“Love Will Tear Us Apart” by Joy Division is an alternative rock masterpiece that examines the paradoxical nature of love and the turmoil it can bring. The song delves into the complexities of reuniting with a loved one, highlighting the challenges that arise when passion and pain intertwine. With its haunting melodies and Ian Curtis’ poignant vocals, “Love Will Tear Us Apart” conveys the fragility of relationships yet captures the irresistible pull to be reunited.

2. “Creep” by Radiohead

Radiohead’s “Creep” is an alternative rock anthem that delves into the feelings of self-doubt and isolation. While not explicitly about reuniting, the underlying message of longing for connection resonates with listeners who have experienced the desire to rebuild a broken relationship. The song’s introspective lyrics and Thom Yorke’s emotive delivery create an atmosphere of vulnerability and the universal need to belong.

3. “Wonderwall” by Oasis

“Wonderwall” by Oasis is an alternative rock classic that explores the complexities of reuniting with someone who was once integral to our lives. The song’s introspective lyrics and poignant melodies capture the bittersweet yearning to reconnect and the sense of loss that comes with the passage of time. With its iconic guitar strumming and Liam Gallagher’s distinctive vocals, “Wonderwall” is a testament to the enduring power of love and the underlying hope for second chances.

VII. Hip-Hop Songs

Hip-hop, a genre known for its poetic storytelling and pulsating beats, has also embraced the theme of reuniting. These songs touch upon the struggles, triumphs, and complexities of love, showcasing the resilience in relationships and the unwavering desire to reconcile. Here are three hip-hop songs that delve into the theme of reuniting:

1. “Empire State of Mind” by Jay-Z ft. Alicia Keys

“Empire State of Mind” by Jay-Z featuring Alicia Keys is an iconic hip-hop anthem that celebrates the spirit of reunion and triumph. The song captures the essence of returning to a place that holds special meaning, where memories were made and connections were forged. Jay-Z’s powerful verses, combined with Alicia Keys’ soulful vocals, create an anthemic track that exemplifies the beauty of overcoming obstacles and reuniting with a place, a person, or a dream.

2. “Love the Way You Lie” by Eminem ft. Rihanna

Eminem’s “Love the Way You Lie,” featuring Rihanna, is a powerful hip-hop ballad that delves into the volatile nature of relationships and the complicated dynamics of reuniting after tumultuous times. The song explores the destructive cycle of love and the addictive pull to return to a toxic relationship. Eminem’s intense lyrics combined with Rihanna’s soulful chorus create a captivating narrative that reflects the tumultuous journey of rekindling love.

3. “Hotline Bling” by Drake

Drake’s “Hotline Bling” is a hip-hop track that showcases the complexity of reuniting and the struggle to find closure after a breakup. The song’s catchy melodies and Drake’s emotive delivery create an infectious anthem that addresses the mixed emotions associated with reconnecting with an old flame. “Hotline Bling” reminds us that love can be a messy and intricate dance, but sometimes, it’s worth stepping back into the spotlight for one more chance.

VIII. Electronic Songs

Electronic music, with its pulsating beats and infectious energy, has also explored the theme of reuniting through captivating compositions. These songs infuse elements of nostalgia and romance into the electronic realm, creating a unique blend of emotions. Here are three electronic songs that beautifully embody the essence of getting back together:

1. “Don’t You Worry Child” by Swedish House Mafia ft. John Martin

“Don’t You Worry Child” by Swedish House Mafia featuring John Martin is an electrifying electronic dance anthem that embraces the euphoria of reuniting and the anticipation of a brighter future. The song’s uplifting melodies and powerful vocals convey a sense of hope and the idea that love can triumph even in the face of adversity. “Don’t You Worry Child” is a reminder that sometimes, getting back together allows us to conquer our fears and embrace a newfound happiness.

2. “With You” by Flight Facilities

Flight Facilities’ “With You” is a captivating electronic track that beautifully blends elements of nostalgia and romance. The song’s dreamy synthesizers and enchanting melodies create a mesmerizing atmosphere that takes listeners on a journey of reuniting with a loved one. “With You” reminds us of the transformative power of rekindling old flames and the joy that comes with embracing the present moment.

3. “Midnight City” by M83

M83’s “Midnight City” is an electronic masterpiece that seamlessly combines pulsating beats and ethereal melodies. While not explicitly about reuniting, the song’s atmospheric soundscapes evoke a sense of longing and the desire to reunite with a loved one. “Midnight City” transports listeners to a world of vibrant possibilities and captures the essence of reconnecting with someone dear.

IX. Ballad Songs

Ballads have the unique ability to tug at our heartstrings and convey the depth of our emotions. These songs about reuniting are no exception, capturing the essence of second chances and the enduring power of love. Here are three ballads that beautifully express the theme of getting back together:

1. “I Will Always Love You” by Whitney Houston

Whitney Houston’s rendition of “I Will Always Love You” is an iconic ballad that resonates with anyone who has experienced the pain of separation and the yearning to reunite with a loved one. This emotionally charged track showcases Houston’s incredible vocal range and heartfelt delivery, capturing the raw emotion associated with rekindling old flames. “I Will Always Love You” stands as a testament to love’s enduring power, even in the face of heartbreak.

2. “My Heart Will Go On” by Celine Dion

Celine Dion’s “My Heart Will Go On,” the timeless ballad from the iconic film “Titanic,” represents the indomitable spirit of love and the desire to reunite, even across vast distances. This emotionally charged song captures the eternal bond between two souls and the hope that reuniting is possible, regardless of the circumstances. Dion’s powerful vocals and the sweeping orchestration make “My Heart Will Go On” an anthem for unbreakable love.

3. “Hello” by Adele

Adele’s “Hello” is a soul-stirring ballad that explores the complexities of reuniting and the emotions that arise when old flames resurface. The song’s haunting piano melodies, coupled with Adele’s powerful vocals, flawlessly convey the pain of separation and the bittersweet hope that accompanies reunion. “Hello” reminds us that sometimes reconnecting with a past love can lead to a profound understanding of ourselves, and perhaps, a chance at redemption.

X. 80s Classics

The 80s were a golden era for music, giving rise to iconic songs that have stood the test of time. When it comes to reuniting, these classics perfectly capture the essence of the decade and the complex emotions associated with reconnecting with a loved one. Here are three 80s classics that embody the theme of getting back together:

1. “Total Eclipse of the Heart” by Bonnie Tyler

Bonnie Tyler’s “Total Eclipse of the Heart” is an emotional power ballad that expertly captures the turmoil and longing associated with reuniting. With its soaring vocals and powerful instrumentals, the song immerses listeners in a world of intense emotions, reflecting the ups and downs of love. “Total Eclipse of the Heart” takes us on a journey of rediscovery and the hope of reigniting the flame that once burned bright.

2. “Take on Me” by A-ha

A-ha’s “Take on Me” is an infectious synth-pop anthem that embodies the exhilaration and anticipation of reuniting with a loved one. The song’s catchy melodies and dynamic vocals take listeners on a musical journey that celebrates the excitement and possibility of a reunion. “Take on Me” reminds us that sometimes, the thrill of reconnecting is as invigorating as the first time we fell in love.

3. “Every Breath You Take” by The Police

The Police’s “Every Breath You Take” is an iconic rock ballad that delves into the complexities of reuniting and the obsessive desire to be reunited with a former lover. While often misinterpreted as a love song, its haunting melody and introspective lyrics actually explore the darker side of longing and the desperation that can accompany reunification. Sting’s distinctive vocals and the distinctive guitar riff make “Every Breath You Take” an enduring classic within the theme of getting back together.

Music has the power to bring people closer, heal wounds, and evoke powerful emotions. The songs listed above capture the essence of reuniting, from the heart-wrenching R&B ballads to the energizing pop anthems, soulful jazz tunes, and electrifying rock classics. Whether it’s the desire to mend a broken relationship or the excitement of rediscovering an old flame, these songs perfectly convey the complexities and emotions associated with reunification. So, the next time you find yourself yearning to reconnect with a loved one, create a memorable playlist filled with these timeless classics. Allow the melodies and lyrics to guide you on a journey of love, second chances, and the transformative power of reuniting through music.

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‘Whatever plan you might have for your family, the Lord’s plan is better’: Mom shares her infertility journey

This week is infertility awareness week.

Abbie Coleman , Multimedia Journalist

ROANOKE, VA – Raising awareness about infertility.

It’s an unfortunate difficulty impacting one in six people worldwide.

“It never crosses your mind that when you want to have kids you won’t be able to have kids,” mom Ericka Solano said.

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Ericka Solano and her husband Glen are the proud parents of one-and-a-half-year-old twins, Jonah and Perry.

“Our son is very sweet and emotional and our daughter is full of energy and full of personality,” Solano said.

But their road to parenthood was far from easy. Over the course of five years, they went through several IUI’s and several rounds of IVF.

“Three of the transfers were failures, two were pregnancies that ended in early miscarriage,” Solano said.

Over time, it took a bigger and bigger toll on Ericka.

“I started having panic attacks that correlated with extremely high highs and also really low lows,” she said.

Holly Humphreys is a counselor at Thriveworks in Roanoke.

She tells us she’s worked closely with couples and individuals struggling to conceive.

“It’s a mixed bag of feelings that come with infertility issues. There’s a lot of negative social impact that affects people so they can feel depression, anxiety, stress, social stigma,” Humphreys said.

She said it can be hard to navigate discussions about pregnancy.

“Try not to talk about your own pregnancy and children around them cause that is a very sensitive topic, but do include them, make them feel involved,” Humphreys said.

Ericka tells us there are also feelings of guilt.

“A waterfall of emotions. Between me, my husband, my family, everyone you drug along through the process. You feel a little guilty that the people who have been following have been following you for so long,” Solano said.

But Humphreys said that support system is crucial.

“It’s a process, you know, and you really need to take it one moment or one task at a time. It’s not something you can speed through even though you wish that you could be past it,” Humphreys said.

Ericka found a support group in Roanoke for women struggling with infertility, and said it made a world of difference.

“I don’t think I could have gone through it without those who were also going through it at the same time, or had been through it before,” Solano said.

In the end, Ericka’s last embryo transfer was the one that gave her her twins — and the day they were born was a day she couldn’t believe.

“Having them bring these living being up to your face, I could kiss them. It was really awesome. Whatever plan you might have for your family, the lord’s plan is better,” Solano said.

The Southwest Virginia Infertility Support Group meets on the second Tuesday of every month.

Their meetings are at 6:30 p.m. at the Panera located at 4202 Electric Rd. in Roanoke. Anyone interested in attending is asked to reach out to Laura West at [email protected] before attending your first meeting.

Copyright 2024 by WSLS 10 - All rights reserved.

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Abbie Coleman officially joined the WSLS 10 News team in January 2023.

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The Science of Siblings

How two good friends became sworn siblings — with the revival of an ancient ritual.

Rhaina Cohen

Scholars Susan Ashbrook Harvey, left, and Robin Darling Young became "sworn siblings" after an ancient ritual at the Church of the Holy Sepulchre in Jerusalem. Jodi Hilton for NPR; Keren Carrion/NPR hide caption

Scholars Susan Ashbrook Harvey, left, and Robin Darling Young became "sworn siblings" after an ancient ritual at the Church of the Holy Sepulchre in Jerusalem.

The Science of Siblings is a new series exploring the ways our siblings can influence us, from our money and our mental health all the way down to our very molecules. We'll be sharing these stories over the next several weeks.

The first time Susan Ashbrook Harvey and Robin Darling Young traveled together in the Middle East, they got very close very quickly. It was 1985, and the two scholars were crammed into a tiny van with several others bound for Tur Abdin, a hilly region in southeast Turkey filled with holy sites .

"We had squeezed ourselves into a dolmish — a van — that was literally full of people. If you know dolmatas [a Greek dish of rice packed tightly into grape leaves], it's the same word," Darling Young says. "We rode down with everybody and her chicken."

On paper, the two scholars had a lot in common when they met decades ago. They both studied the ancient traditions of Syriac Orthodox Christianity. Both were women in their mid-30s in a male-dominated field. But until their trip, they'd really only crossed paths at conferences.

So when they decided to travel for three weeks together, to see with their own eyes the holy places they'd only read about on the page — it was a leap of faith.

"Robin called me up one day and said, 'Let's go to visit the Syriac East,'" Harvey recalls. "It was kind of risky to do this kind of trip together, because there was no escape."

Robin Darling Young, a professor at Catholic University of America in Washington D.C., took a fateful trip in 1985 to visit holy sites in the Middle East with Susan Ashbrook Harvey. Keren Carrion/NPR hide caption

Robin Darling Young, a professor at Catholic University of America in Washington D.C., took a fateful trip in 1985 to visit holy sites in the Middle East with Susan Ashbrook Harvey.

The two women dove into the adventure. They hitchhiked through the countryside and attended worship services in church communities and villages. When the day was over, they'd sleep in sparse, shared pilgrims' quarters in monasteries, where monks would sing hymns at night.

That intense experience of travel and research tested them — and bonded them.

Three weeks later, when they reached Jerusalem, they had become so close that Mor Dionysius Behnan Jajjawi, then the Archbishop of the Syriac Orthodox Church in Jerusalem and the Holy Land, noticed the special quality of their friendship.

After welcoming them as pilgrims and guests, and giving them a personal tour of the city's Syrian churches, he observed that "we had a friendship that was based on something deeper than blood, because our relationship was based on something bigger and greater than ourselves," Harvey says.

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Blended families are common. here are tips to help stepsiblings get along.

When they came to the Church of the Holy Sepulchre — which many Christians consider the holiest place in the world, thought to be the site where Jesus was crucified — Archbishop Jajjawi asked: "Would you like to come to the liturgy, after which we will perform an ancient ritual?" Darling Young recalls.

The ritual he had in mind would join these friends as sisters, in a traditional ceremony that dates back thousands of years.

A practice that dates back to 4th-century monks

At the Church of the Holy Sepulchre, Archbishop Jajjawi offered to perform an ancient ritual that would join Darling Young, left, and Harvey as sisters. Image from Susan Ashbrook Harvey hide caption

The practice, called "adelphopoiesis," means "brother-making" in Greek and is thought to have originated among monks, says Claudia Rapp , a Byzantine scholar at the University of Vienna and author of the book Brother-Making in Late Antiquity and Byzantium.

"The earliest inklings we find are for these kinds of prayers to be performed between two people who are on the same spiritual journey," Rapp says. Historical records show that sworn brothers would then be obliged to pray for each other and would sometimes be buried in the same tomb.

Evidence for this practice between monks dates back to between 4th- and 7th-century ancient Egypt, Rapp says. By the ninth century, the practice spread. "Laypeople adopt[ed] the practice for themselves, in order to either cement friendships or to neutralize enemies — and generally to extend their families so that they can have a wider social network within which to operate," Rapp says.

Both scholars studied the ancient traditions of Syriac Christianity. Their trip to visit these ancient holy sites together was a chance to see with their own eyes what they'd spent years studying. Jodi Hilton for NPR hide caption

Both scholars studied the ancient traditions of Syriac Christianity. Their trip to visit these ancient holy sites together was a chance to see with their own eyes what they'd spent years studying.

While some scholars have presented these ceremonies as early forms of same-sex romantic marriage, Rapp says the evidence does not fully support this interpretation. "[While] some people [may] have chosen it to cement a strong emotional bond that may also have included sexual activity ... I don't think ritual brotherhood was essential for people who wanted to live in male relationships [as lovers]," Rapp says.

At the heart of this cozy coffee shop lies a big sister's love for her little brother

She explains that adelphopoiesis is "not a replacement for marriage. It's an additional social networking strategy."

Versions of the practice existed in other regions too. In the Balkans, Muslims and Christians swore brotherhood so they wouldn't have to fight each other in religious conflicts. In medieval England , men who appeared to have practiced sworn brotherhood now lie together in joint crypts.

Sworn siblings in China helped each other in chaotic times

In China, stories and records documenting sworn brotherhood date back to 350 B.C.E., says Wendy Chen , a professor at Texas Tech University who has studied the practice in ancient China. One of the earliest stories centers on the deep friendship between a government official and a woodcutter who, despite their social class differences, bonded over a shared love of music.

Perhaps the best-known story of sworn brothers in China — one that Chen herself learned growing up — comes from Romance of the Three Kingdoms , considered one of four great classical novels in Chinese pre-modern literature. Set during the waning days of the Han dynasty, which fell in 220 C.E ., three men swear brotherhood to each other and commit to the shared goal of protecting the empire from rebels.

"Sworn siblinghood often took place toward the end of each dynasty," typically a chaotic time, Chen says. "People had to rely on each other to achieve their goals, and sometimes even for survival."

Chen says, in China, the practice is steeped in Confucian philosophy — it stresses benevolence and righteousness, promising loyalty and mutual aid between friends.

An ancient ceremony, performed in modern times

Susan Harvey, a professor of History and Religion at Brown University, and her friend Robin Darling Young became "sworn siblings" after the Archbishop of the Syriac Orthodox Church of Jerusalem performed an ancient ritual at the Church of the Holy Sepulchre in Jerusalem. Jodi Hilton for NPR hide caption

Robin Darling Young and Susan Harvey provided mutual support during their travels in 1985. They believe Archbishop Jajjawi noticed this.

"I think the Archbishop appreciated the ease with which we interacted and the respect with which we approached our work together as a team," Harvey says.

That's likely why, at the Church of the Holy Sepulchre, he led them away from the crowd, to a side alcove holding the tomb reputed to be the tomb of Jesus.

It was a small room, "carved straight into the living rock," Harvey says — lit with candles, perfumed with incense. The Archbishop wore full embroidered vestments and a long satiny stole draped around his neck.

"He took our two right hands and put them together, and then he wrapped the stole around our hands for the blessing," Darling Young says.

The Archbishop said prayers over them. "I don't think we actually quite knew what was going on — it was all being done in Syriac, which is another language," says Susan. For her part, Darling Young says the moment was overwhelming.

"At this point, it's so serious and awe-inspiring, I'm blanking out," she recalls. "All I remember is 'Barekmor,' which means 'bless me, o Lord.'"

"Barekmor" — they repeated. "And then he announced to us that we were now sisters forever. And so it was," says Darling Young.

"And so it was," Harvey echoes.

Both women say the ceremony marked a shift in their friendship. "It was a quasi-sacrament," Darling Young says. "It had the effect of gathering together the other experiences we'd had prior to it and sealing and condensing them. Our ways of thinking became connected, not just our hands."

Harvey likens the memory to "a little treasure we carry around in our pockets." Nearly 40 years later, they still sometimes refer to each other as "beloved sister."

Today, while there are ceremonies marking weddings, adoptions and teenage rites of passage, there aren't really ceremonies to honor friendships, Harvey says. She sees value in restoring this lost art of brother- and sister-making.

"This is a way of really valuing [friendships], of saying: This is something truly special. That is a real gift," she says. "I wish there was a way to offer something like that."

Darling Young points out that the scripts do exist in ancient texts. They're available to anyone who wants to dust them off and celebrate their best friendships.

This story elaborates on a chapter from The Other Significant Others: Reimagining Life with Friendship at the Center , a book by Rhaina Cohen that published this year.

More from the Science of Siblings series:

• Gay people often have older brothers. Why? And does it matter?
• A gunman stole his twin from him. This is what he's learned about grieving a sibling
• In the womb, a brother's hormones can shape a sister's future
• These identical twins both grew up with autism, but took very different paths
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• siblinghood
• sworn siblings
• Science of Siblings
• European history
• Chinese history

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Getting the band back together, smsu hosts alumni weekend for band and choir members.

Photo by Deb Gau Current and past members of the SMSU/Community Concert Band rehearse for a special concert performance on Saturday.

MARSHALL — When past band and choir members from Southwest Minnesota State University got back together over the weekend, it wasn’t just a reunion. It was a chance to perform together again.

On Saturday morning, band alumni joined current SMSU/Community Concert Band onstage for a special concert rehearsal.

“This is going to be a lot of fun,” band director Dr. John Ginocchio told the crowd.

Past choir and band members said it was fun to have an event focused on music alumni, especially since they got to make music together again.

“It’s great that we have an activity with all the old crew,” said John Ward, a Washington state resident and a past member of the choir.

“It’s good to see each other again, too,” said Karen Neinstadt.

Neinstadt said she traveled from St. Paul to attend the alumni weekend and play violin with the Concert Band.

This weekend, SMSU held a few different alumni events for past members of SMSU bands and choirs. In addition to a reception and campus tours, band and choir members also got a chance to perform again, at concerts Saturday and Sunday. First, alumni band members joined up with the SMSU/Community Concert Band and the SMSU Symphonic Chamber Winds group for a Saturday concert. On Sunday, it was the choir alumni’s turn, as they sang together with the SMSU Chorale.

Ginocchio said SMSU has held some events for music alumni in the past.

“This is the first one we’ve done in a while,” he said.

Choral director Dr. Stephen Kingsbury said they felt it was important to be able to bring together people from all eras of the choir and band programs.

“It’s been wonderful,” Kingsbury said.

Through the alumni events, he was introduced to people who were part of the choir even before he came to SMSU.

SMSU band and choir alumni included “a good mix” of people, said reunion attendees like Cliodhna Bridget Albright. The university’s bands and choirs aren’t only made up of music students, and the music groups also include area community members.

“I really loved the program,” Ward said.

At an alumni reception Saturday, Neinstadt said she some of the people she was sitting with were all at SMSU in the early 2000s. It was good to get to meet up again, and to see all of the ways the campus had changed, they said.

“There’s been a lot of changes, because some of us were here before the fire,” said band alumna and Rosemount resident Denae Olsen.

The 2002 fire at SMSU destroyed the campus’s old student center, which has since been replaced with a new building.

Ward said that getting to meet people from different generations of band and choir was part of the fun at the alumni weekend.

“And you hear stories of everything people are doing these days,” he said.

Choir alumni, including Cottonwood resident Dawnella Walters, said Saturday that they were looking forward to joining the SMSU Chorale for part of its concert.

“It’s going to be a lot of fun hearing all the voices coming together,” Walters said.

Alumni said the SMSU band and choir programs formed a connection with the university and Marshall area community. That was one of the best things about being part of the choir, Walters said.

“I met some good people. Making music with them, you become like a big family,” she said.

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Eli Katoa was born and raised on a remote Tongan island. Now he's becoming Melbourne Storm's newest weapon

Analysis Sport Eli Katoa was born and raised on a remote Tongan island. Now he's becoming Melbourne Storm's newest weapon

As a Melbourne back rower, Eli Katoa has a lot to live up to. 

Playing second row for the Storm is a star-making position — the likes of Ryan Hoffman, Felise Kaufusi, Kevin Proctor, Kenny Bromwich, Tohu Harris, Sika Manu and Adam Blair all rose to represent their countries while lurking on the edge for Craig Bellamy's great winning machine.

Sometimes it was a matter of plucking them straight from the junior ranks. Hoffman was an Australian Schoolboy. Blair and Manu were both Junior Kiwis. Proctor, somehow, was both.

Others came from further off the beaten track. Harris got a start after impressing at an open trial in New Zealand. Bromwich and Kaufusi earned their chances after serving lengthy apprenticeships off the bench for the club.

But none of the Storm's legion of successful back rowers have a story quite like Katoa, the current heir to the second-row throne. 

It began a world away from the bright lights of NRL stardom in the Tongan village of Koulo.

It's the kind of place that's hard to find unless you already know where it is. Head north from Nuku'alofa for about 200 kilometres until you reach the Ha'apai islands group.

There, on the island of Lifuka, you'll find Koulo, population 171. That's home for Katoa, it always will be, and until he left for boarding school in Auckland when he was 17, it was his world

"Mum and my family are still over there. Last year I managed to get them over for a game, it was the first time they'd left Tonga. I want to do the same thing this year, getting them over here, that's the main thing for me," Katoa said.

"The thing I miss the most is my family. The whole community is great, but it's all about my family. I have one brother and two sisters, I'm the second youngest and they're all still over there.

"I try to get there once a year, I always love going home.

"It's a flight from Nuku'alofa, or a boat. But it doesn't matter how far it is, not to me."

It must feel so removed from the bright lights of the Sydney Football Stadium, where Katoa scored a try and set up another in Melbourne's win over the Roosters last week .

The match showed why the Storm were so keen to get Katoa over from the Warriors last year and why he signed a three-year extension with the club midway through 2023.

He has the size to barrel over defenders, the quick feet to hit holes, the athleticism to act as an aerial threat, the soft hands to throw passes and catch bombs and the attacking skill to ball-play before the line and offload in contact.

There were glimpses of those attributes during his time with the Warriors, where he played 46 games in three seasons from 2020 to 2022 – enough so that Canberra and the Dolphins were keen on the 24-year old.

But finding raw, talented players who just need the right guidance is as much of a tradition for Bellamy's Storm as producing back rowers. The fit was perfect, right from the start.

Katoa had a strong maiden campaign with the club, recovering from an eye injury that he initially feared would leave him half-blind to finish the season strongly and earn his Test debut for Tonga.

There's been more of the same in 2024 — he's scored three tries, set up two more, averaged 100 metres a game and increased his defensive workrate.

In short, he's starting do all the things the great Melbourne back rowers of the past have done. It's a lot to take on, but he's up for the challenge.

"Everyone knows how good a club they are, their history speaks for itself. When I first came in, everyone was so welcoming and you could see that culture from day one — everyone wants to win, but everyone is just as focused on working for each other," Katoa said.

"That's what we pride ourselves on here."

Katoa admits he's far from the finished product. When it comes to rugby league, he's still a relative beginner even after four years in the top grade — he'd only played 13 games of league in his entire life before his NRL debut in 2020. 

He had a couple of errors against the Roosters but he's getting closer to realising his enormous talent by the week and his work off the ball, especially defensively and chasing kicks, remained strong.

For all the things he can do that few other back rowers can match, mastering those little things are what will truly make him the Storm's next back-row success story and he is hell bent on getting there.

"I wouldn't say I'm comfortable, I'm more confident. Last year was a lot about adapting to the system, learning how they play, and this year I know my role better and the role of the players around me," Katoa said.

"It's all down to the reps we do at training, that's what's behind all the combinations.

"I didn't have the best start [against the Roosters], I was forcing some offloads, but that's footy and I'm not going to go away from my strength.

"I still need to work on it, because it put a lot of pressure on us. Sometimes it's not there, that's what I'm still learning.

"Jahrome Hughes has been a big part of it, he's really worked hard on building our combination, but everyone's been great. I don't have any family in Melbourne but I live near some of the boys and they're always there for me."

Katoa will again form a big part of Melbourne's game plan when they take on the Rabbitohs on Anzac Day.

The match is one of the club's highlights of the season, with a bumper crowd expected at AAMI Park, and they will all be watching back home.

The CEO of Digicel bought a TV for Katoa's mother not long after his NRL debut so she could see her boy play and now half the village comes around to watch the pride of Koulo as he strives to live up to what's come before him.

He's doing everything he can to get there and they're all with him every step of the way.

"They loved the Warriors," Katoa said.

"But as soon as I moved, they all jumped on the Storm."

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